Easily Offended, Hyperly-Divided?

We were listening to a sermon Sunday, live stream from Lutheran Church of Hope. and one statement by the pastor drew my full attention.  "The world is easily offended and hyperly-divided."  Isn't that the truth!  He went on to say that one pastor had shared he had an active small group in his church split up.  When he asked what had happened, one of the members of that group said, "Well, we discovered we did not all hold the same political views."  This "offense" broke up their well established church group. 

Several times in the past week my attention has been drawn to the word offense or offending.  It has come up in a devotional, a sermon, on TV, and in a book I am reading.  When things come up in 3's or more, I pay attention because usually that means God is trying to get my attention.

The book I am reading spoke about how offense can get in the way of our faith growing, even our relationship with God.  God does not want us to cause offense or hold on to offenses.  I was challenged by what I read and wanted to study it more.

Hearing what the pastor stated about the world resonated with me.  Just think about it for a minute......A church group, a group that follows Jesus and his commandments was so offended by their differences politically that they split up.  Can I just say that made Satan very happy.  Mission accomplished!  United we stand, divided we fall.

Yes, we are an easily offended nation.  Recently Gayle King had her life threatened because someone at CBS, her employer, took an interview she was part of and aired it out of context.  She was asking someone about Kobe Bryant's past accusations of sexual misconduct.  Kobe had recently died in a heliocopter crash, and someone was offended enough to threaten her life?

When did we become a nation of easily offended people?  When did we become so hyperly-divided politically, religiously, or just as human beings in this broken world?   When did it become okay to threaten someone's life because you don't like what they have said?  And why?

I have had to reflect on my own offenses.........do I owe someone an apology?  Am I holding a grudge against someone who has caused problems in my life?  Are any offenses getting in the way of my relationship with God?  Do I hold offenses at God?  There is definitely room for improvement when I answer these questions honestly!

Our hearts hold the offenses we have, the unforgiveness that festers within.  It is so important that we bring them before God and leave them at His feet.  It is important for our physical and spiritual health, for our relationships with others and most importantly our relationship with God. 

We Ain't Looking So Clean!

A couple of weeks ago Joel washed the outside windows while I helped tackle the inside.  When we were finished they looked pretty good.........or so we thought.  The next day when we looked closely I said to Joel....... "Honey, the windows?  They "ain't" looking so clean!"  What is up with that??

So today, we started over with the windows.  Again.  On December 4th.  Are we bundled up as we venture outside to soap and rinse and dry?  Nope.  It was 64 degrees by 11 am today.  Seriously.  In northern Iowa.  Huh.  We have been given another chance to make the windows sparkling clean.  This time we took vinegar and mixed in another ingredient, a little Seventh Generation dish detergent and it broke up the dirt and grime.  Rinsing the glass with vinegar water and wiping with a soft cloth had us smiling.  With a little extra work and the right ingredients, the windows are clean!

As I was washing the windows I actually started to see a connection here and started to sing  "What can wash away our sins.....nothing but the blood of Jesus."   It seems that we often try to eliminate our sins with self control, determination, and prayer.  Not a bad combination, but without that extra ingredient ~ Jesus~ to cut through the dirt and grime in our lives, we ain't looking so clean.  Jesus suffered and died for us.  For our sins.  For sickness and disease (Is. 54).  He alone can wash away our sins....make us clean.  Nothing but the blood of Jesus!

So we cleaned up the windows today in shirt sleeves, and we are all ready for the cold and snow that is arriving tonight.  Winter is on it's way.  Think I will bundle up under my wool comforter and listen to a little music.  Maybe the song I was humming today!  Nothing but the blood.  Nothing but the blood of Jesus.

                                                                        Song by Matt Redman 

The Shack Within Us All

Wm Paul Young, author of The Shack, spoke at a recent Bethel conference on creativity.  He was a powerful speaker, even with his tendency to wander off on a rabbit trail.  I expect that is the creative side of him.  He shared quite a bit of his story, which made an impact on all his listeners.  His parents were missionaries in the highlands of New Guinea with the Dani tribe that had it's own language, worshiped spirits, and practiced cannibalism. He was raised til age 6 mostly by the tribe, as his parents were busy doing mission work.  He remembered hearing the tribe members discuss whether or not to kill his parents, but said he never felt afraid because he considered himself to be part of the tribe!  His first language was the language of the tribe they lived among.  Sadly, the tribe had as part of their secret culture, sexual abuse, and he did not escape that.  It continued when at age 6 he went away to boarding school, where abuse occurred by some of the older boys in the dormitory.  Being away from his parents, and his "people" was very difficult.

Besides the sexual abuse, having a strict, physically abusive father added to his belief that he was a bad person, who was never perfect enough for his dad or anyone else.   He believed the lie that all that happened to him was "his fault".  He kept all this secret from his family.  Finally, at the age of 38, after struggling with addictions and his wife discovering his 3 month affair with her best friend, he hit rock bottom and all his secrets poured out. From this place at the bottom he began his healing journey.  His history and 11 years of healing from his past gave him an unusual perspective of God.  His wife suggested he write his personal faith story so his children would understand who he is and how he thinks.  The result was "The Shack", written originally just for his family and a few close friends.  God had other plans, though, and the rest is history with more than 20 million books having been sold to this date.

Paul Young's story is important to hear because you can see the redemption in it.  His story holds within it the power of the cross.  All our stories do.  During the conference he told everyone that the shack in his book represents the inner person within each of us.  It was an "aha" moment for both Joel and myself and resolved some of the mystery of his novel.   Just like the book and movie reveals, I believe that the "shack" within us is where Papa God, Jesus, and Holy Spirit meet us to provide healing, love, forgiveness, and new life in Christ.

It may for some, be difficult to uncover what the "shack" within holds close to the heart.  We may believe the lies that our story shared will make people think less of us, uncovering our history will be too painful or selfish, or we will be misunderstood.  Hiding our stories gives us a false sense of living in a perfect, air-brushed, Instagram/Facebook world. It leaves us living with an inner shack that is falling down around us.  Let your story be told!  Sharing our stories is not done to point the finger, gain sympathy, or encourage us to live as a victim.  Just the opposite.  There may be a fine line between dwelling on your past and using your past to show God's love for you then and now, but God tells us our stories are very important because He walks in the midst of them and through our history the power of the cross is seen.  Giving Him the glory reveals our redemption and victory in Papa God!

Mac, in the book and movie, was able to find healing within after tragedy.  Wm. Paul Young was able to find healing, redemption, and a deeper relationship with Papa God by walking through his own "valley".   Their stories beckon us to share our own, seeking the Healer and the healing needed with Papa guiding the way.  May God's love and healing power be revealed in the story of each of His children.

All Ages Gathering In The Water

About 10 days ago Joel had a Sunday off and we headed back to Faith Lutheran in the village of Miller Iowa where we attended services and held fellowship with the people there.  It was great fun to worship and see many of the people we came to know and care about.  After services and coffee we helped get backpacks ready for kids in need.  It was a well spent hour visiting, laughing, helping. When we left the church we headed to our favorite lake, one of only a few in Iowa.  We walked along the shoreline and came across a large gathering of people.  We ventured closer and discovered that the Lutheran church that worships summers in the park was baptizing people in the lake. We could not miss that, so we stood and watched adults, babies, children, and some in need of healing go into the lake to be baptized.  All ages gathering in the water.......carried by mom or dad, walking on their own, some helping the ill.  It was a blessing just to observe and give thanks to those making a commitment to Jesus.

Today as I was watching Bethel Church baptize children through oldsters, with each one speaking about why they wanted to be baptized, I remembered our trip to the Lake and how delightful that was.  As a pastor's wife I certainly have seen many baptisms...mostly babies, some children and adults.  Today as I watched a man in his 70's, shaking from Parkinson's, get into that baptismal tank at Bethel I could not help but weep with joy for him, and pray that he receives not only his Savior but his healing.  Yes Jesus...come......

Life can be so broken, so fragile, so difficult........but with Jesus all is good!  Jesus is the only answer to it all.  Some blame Him for what has happened in their lives, others believe he chooses special people to "suffer" for Him, chosen by God to give glory to Him that way.  Others believe that sickness and disease and early death are not from God at all, but the enemy.

We don't have all the answers tightly wrapped up and kept in a box about God and His ways, but we do know what the Bible says.........and God is so good and loves us soooooo much He gave His only Son to die on a cross so that we can believe, be baptized and be saved.  We know that Christ suffered for our sins on that cross....including sickness and disease.  On bended knee we worship Him and give thanks for all that Jesus has done for us.  We take steps in faith acting on what we believe, receiving His gifts with open arms, just like those who were gathering in the water.  Come, Jesus come.

I Had No Idea!

Yesterday I had cataract surgery on my left eye.  It went well, in spite of it being "surprisingly dense" as the doctor told me.  He had to bring out the "power tools" to crush and remove it.  It took longer than normal, and I woke up in the procedure with the numbing starting to leave my eye.  I was not in pain, just some discomfort in the moment.  The cool thing was when the doctor put in the implant I saw the most beautiful lights!  Hot pink, purple, yellow, blue and lime green.  I saw the doctor again in his office an hour later and he was very happy to see everything look so great "considering" the effort it took to remove it.  The doctor turned to Joel and said, "You wife is so sensitive to medications, I give her only about 1/10th of what I would others.......She is special.  It kinda shows up with all the wrist bands I had on at the surgical center.  One for identification, one for breast cancer (don't use that arm for anything), two for allergies, sensitivities, and reactions.  I tried to tell the medical staff that I don't react much anymore but they tell me, once you have had a reaction it is on your chart for good. Really?  Healing not accepted.  By the way, the 5 bottles are all the drops I am taking for the next 1-5 weeks between 1-4 times a day.  It is like having a job.

There it is again.  I was not normal.  Not even in this!  I surrendered my desire for normal this past week and embraced the west of weird, just to the right of crazy, and "not normal" person that I am and special body that I have!    Normal is only the person you have not yet met......so my son says.  I have also heard normal is just a setting on the dryer.

Back to the cataract.  After 2 long naps and 9 hours of sleep last night I feel pretty good.   I can see!  I am not wearing glasses at all.  I can see colors clearly, everything is so bright, and I can read the smallest print across the bottom of the TV .......oh.....my world has changed now that the cataract that slowly and quietly stole my vision is gone.  Praise Jesus.  Next week the right one will go and then my world will change even more.

I had no idea how dingy and yellow my vision had gotten as the cataracts quietly grew over the lens of my eyes.  It took my breath away when I opened my eyes today.  Tears.  In the midst of all this as I lay in bed this morning marveling at the new world before me, I heard in my spirit, "This is how it is for people who walk in sin."   It overcomes them quietly and slowly and they don't realize how dingy and yellow their world is until they repent, receive forgiveness, and turn to Jesus.  Sin is subtle.  We all sin every day, but sometimes it comes into our lives so subtly and quietly that we are not even aware of what it is doing to us.  When we do know, we repent, receive forgiveness, and embrace what God has for us.  Then our whole world changes!   Just like with the cataract, when it is removed our whole world changes!  And when it is gone we find ourselves saying "I had no idea"!  Thank you Jesus.

Radical Grace In Parenting

"This parenting gig is an experiment in radical grace

and the work of every parent is
 to fully give (love) to the child. 

And it’s the work of every child
to fully forgive the parents."

Ann Voskamp

Our oldest son has a great sense of humor.  He banters with us during phone conversations and yesterday's short call was no different.    I was talking to him about his dad being "obsessed" with figuring out his newly purchased refurbished laptop.  He was spending hours to get everything the way he wanted it...feeling some sense of control I expect.  I went to bed with him on the laptop....I woke up to him downstairs on the laptop!  I expect even if it takes 50 hours, he will be bonding with that piece of technology until he feels he has mastered it.  This is typical when he is dealing with something new.

Matt's response had me laughing.  "So that is where I get it.  Hmmmm  That is what I will tell my kids.  Don't blame me, blame your grandparents!"  He went on to say, "I have come to it late in life, but this blaming the parents is not such a bad thing!"  (giggle)

I can giggle at this, not because we were such great parents, but because I know he forgives us for the mistakes we made as his parents.  That is important, not so much for us, although it feels great, but for himself.  Unforgiveness sucks the life out of people.  Whether we are dealing with parents, others or even ourselves.  Unforgiveness and the blame game may be reasonable and understandable, but it is not Spiritual.  Forgetting might not be an option, but forgiving would be a necessity.  For healing.  For yourself and in obedience to God.  He knows what He is doing, trust Him. 

And laugh.....the way our son has laughed at those traits he picked up from mom and dad and the many mistakes we made....The way he speaks, with a twinkle in his eye, of using his parents as a buffer with his own kids.  Coming from a place of grace.

"Laugh that you lived and dance that you dared

and inhale that it all happened —

and it all was grace."

Ann Voskamp

His Most Beautiful Creation

Friday night we watched the season premiere of Blue Bloods on CBS.  I have shared before that I like this show because it centers around family relationships.  Whether it is the extended family that sits around the table every Sunday for a meal, or the family dressed in blue down at the precinct.  They don't always agree, but they respect each other, forgive grievances, and move forward.  It may be only a TV show, but it works in real life too. 

 The show got me thinking about the importance of family relationships, and I scribbled back to a time in my thirties when I was going to college to be an interpreter for the deaf in a medical setting.  Part of my training was to visit with people in a high rise nursing home.  I was assigned two women.  One was deaf and blind but could speak.  I communicated with her by signing every letter of American Sign Language into her hand. The other was a retired missionary woman who was very ill and spent her days in a darkened room.  I sat quietly with her speaking in gentle tones.  Presence was more important than talking.  The one year on Christmas day, our whole family, including five kids and my mom, drove down to the Twin Cities for an extended family gathering.  Before going we attended church and then offered to take poinsettia plants over to the nursing home where I volunteered.  The people were so grateful for our visit that we could hardly get out of there.  Hundreds of people and so many without anyone to come see them~~~ even on Christmas.

What happened to the families of these people?  Were relationships broken beyond repair?  Was it just easier to walk away than resolve conflicts?  Were their families ALL living far away or "too busy" to visit loved ones?

Yesterday we were reading a devotional where a young man shared about his family trip to Alaska.  His mom had planned the trip for everyone and on the last day they were going to spend 14 hours  on a school bus...on gravel roads....driving through a national park. It did not sound like fun!   He said he enjoyed seeing God's creation outside the windows the first few hours, but towards the end when every mountain looked the same, he realized he was having a greater time with his family......even on a school bus....on a gravel road.  He came to understand this:

"God's most beautiful creation,
as it turns out,
 is a loving family."

 

 

This one sentence spoke volumes to us. 

Joel has been an ordained pastor for 33 years.  He has counseled hundreds of people surrounding the issues of broken relationships.   Even though he/we saw many people who were very connected to their loved ones, we have also known of many who were all alone with little or no contact with family. We, as a couple, have watched many families fractured by unforgiveness and misunderstandings over the years.  We have seen that in our own families.  We have recognized it in ourselves. 

Don't misunderstand me.  I realize that there are abusive family relationships that need to hold strong boundaries, but I am not speaking of those here.

 

Getting back to Blue Bloods, this past episode the family was at odds with each other.  Differences of opinions over something work related brought conflict at the Sunday dinner table.  But they eventually worked it out.  Why?  Because it was important.  I realize family challenges are not resolved in an hour!  I also realize that not many are blessed to have their children and grandchildren live near enough to gather for Sunday dinners....... But the message on this show was similar to the devotional we read.  God's creation of a loving family is one of His greatest works.  

So what is a loving family?  The definition of family has faded and morphed into something different since we grew up in the 50's and 60's, yet, I cannot help but come back to what we believe.  Family is family.  A loving family is one that works things out.   It makes the effort to maintain relationships that are sometimes difficult but so important.  Staying close to those we love means sacrifice, forgiveness, unselfishness, and lots of love.  It means remembering that God created family for a purpose.  It is one of His most beautiful creations!



Forgiving Your Goliath

Today as I watched the Healing School service live streamed in Colorado, the guest speaker, Pastor Greg Mohr shared his insights on how to heal our hearts.  He shared the steps we can take to open the flow needed to not only love ourselves and others, but receive healing of our body.

I found his process for healing the heart very similar to the Sozo ministry techniques used to bring about inner healing. I have been helped by others who are trained in Sozo and I have learned to use some of the techniques to help myself.  I can tell you from experience that they are healing.

Pastor Mohr believes most broken hearts revolve around losses in our lives.  Losses around rejection, betrayal, persecution, the death of a loved one, abandonment, and more.  He had a list of seven things we can do to bring wholeness to our hearts. 

1.  Validate your loss by acknowledging it.
2.  Don't identify with the loss or let it define you.
3.  Prioritize your loss with knowing "this too will pass"
4.  Forgive everyone including yourself.
5.  Commit all losses to the Lord
6.  Apply the cross to your bitter waters
7.  Walk on, move forward.

Pastor Mohr spoke for a long time about forgiveness.  This is also what Sozo ministry focuses on.  Forgiveness and blessings.  He asked who was the Goliath in your life?  Who is the biggest "bully" or hurtful person you have had to deal with?  Someone who has broken your heart in some way.  He had those watching in the auditorium and watching online go through the process of forgiving this Goliath.  It really was really quite powerful.

Forgiveness.  No matter how we come to it, whether through something like Sozo, the process Pastor Mohr mentioned or in another way, it is vital for our own healing ~ Spiritual, emotional or physical.

The Bible tells us how important it is to forgive....to let go...to move on.  Jesus is very clear on forgiving others IF we want to be forgiven.  And also on how many times to forgive someone?  Remember when Peter asked Jesus if seven times was enough?   Seventy times seven Jesus replied.   Whoa.......

Forgiveness.  I believe that God wants us to forgive over and over again because He loves US.  He knows how unforgiveness opens the door to the enemy.  He knows that the brokenhearted need healing and that forgiveness is the door that opens to that!  He knows that in some way we are all brokenhearted and need healing.

Forgiveness.  It is not a recommendation.  It is a command.  It is healing for the brokenhearted.  It is freeing!  Do you have a Goliath you need to forgive?  Are you ready?  Jesus is there to help you.  Just ask. 

What God Requires

In our relationships, do we love other people in their brokenness?  Especially if it involves those who hurt us?  If we did we would then have to accept them where they are.  We would need to forgive them, and if we forgive them then we would not be able to assign blame or hold on to our own hurts that we may feel are justified.  We would have to face our own brokenness.  I acknowledge and sense resistance within myself and others.

And yet this is what God requires of us.

And then there is the difficulty we have in letting others change.  If we have been hurt by someone's words or actions once, twice, even three times, we then see all future encounters with that person from a "guarded" protective perspective. No matter what is said, it is colored by the past.  It can become a "damned if you do or damned if you don't" situation.  They or we never say or do the right thing. Whether it is with a friend, a neighbor, our boss, or our children, it is often difficult to see the change, be the change, or through love, grace, and forgiveness accept and embrace the change.

And yet this is what God requires of us.

Do we try to hide our brokenness from others?  Do we hide it from ourselves by shining a light on the brokenness of others?  Does the shame we feel permeate the atmosphere around us?  And why is it often so much easier to embrace and help strangers in their imperfection than it is to help and embrace those closest to us?  Is it because our own shame, hurt and disappointments get in the way?
Resistance?

And yet this is what God requires of us.

Why is it so easy to point out the sins of others?  Why do we put ourselves on a higher plain judging others in their brokenness, making decisions on what is forgivable based on our own experiences or understanding instead of God's Word.

And yet this is what God requires of us.

Loving and forgiving those who have hurt or disappointed us is not denying their actions, it is being obedient to God.  Being willing to let go of past hurts while opening our hearts to the positive changes in people does not necessarily mean we forget the past, but it does mean in obedience to God we embrace the future with expectancy.  Acknowledging our own brokenness does not shame us, it empowers us. Refusing to judge others from a throne of our own making let's our God be God.

This is what God requires of us.

"Forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those

 who trespass against us."

Matthew 6:12

 

~~~~

"So now I am giving you a new commandment: 

Love one another. 

Just as I have loved you, you need to love one another."

John 13:34

The Appraiser

This morning an appraiser came as part of our adventure in refinancing our house.  It was odd to have someone we did not know come through our home taking measurements, photos and notes. We were looking  at our home through a stranger's eyes.

Joel and I saw this from different, but telling perspectives.  Joel was proud of all the work we did or had done by professionals in the past nine years.  The list is extensive.  We took an ugly duckling and created a swan...or close to it.  He saw great changes and a nice house. I saw all the work that was done, BUT I focused on the things that still needed work!  I said nothing but found myself anxious and wanting to tell this guy our future plans for renovations.

Very telling.

Joel knows what still needs to be done but is able to find joy in what has been accomplished. I see all the changes, and I am happy about them.....but I find myself easily forgetting what has changed for the better, and am drawn to what is not done.

Whether it is our home or the person I see in the mirror, the flaws can stand out as eyesores for me! And yet I know we have a nice home and I know that I have been "fearfully and wonderfully made"!  I know that I am enough because of Jesus.  The other day The Lord whispered to me......" You are so much harder on yourself than I would be on you."

Some day we will all stand before The Appraiser, our Lord.  Will He be a stranger to us or will we know Him well?  What will He see?

Because of Jesus, because of Father God sending His only Son to die for us, He will see that we are fearfully and wonderfully made!  He will see us through His Son's light!  He will see us forgiven, flawless, and  whole.  Because of His love for us we can stand strong on that final day, knowing we are no longer flawed or unfinished.  Because of Jesus.

Purging "Stuff"

On my other blog that speaks of my healing journey, I wrote about purging our cupboards of all the medications, supplements, and herbs that Joel and I took for years in the attempt to rid our bodies of Lyme Disease.  With the power of prayer, we both are now free of Lyme.  Joel is doing extremely well, and I am doing much better but not "there" quite yet. In time!

As I thought how great it made me feel to get rid of all that stuff, my mind went to all the other things I might be holding on to---"stuff" that no longer or never did serve any purpose.

Maybe there is a resentment I think is justified......or a fear that continues to control me.  Maybe there is a hidden sin I need to repent of, or a festering hurt that is taking up valuable space and is depleting my energy.  Maybe, just maybe, it is time once again to go through the cupboards of my heart and do a little purging.

 When I purged our cupboards of all those bottles and jars, I felt empowered.  The more I dumped in the garbage the stronger my sense of freedom.  I know that would apply to all the stuff I need to dump from my heart, too.  In His infinite wisdom God has instructed us to forgive, love, and confess.

Yesterday I purged the bottles and praised God that the season for those treatments
 has passed.  Today I am going to start purging all the junk in my heart and praise God for filling those now empty places with His healing love.

Conversations In The Garden: Forgiveness

About two years ago, during my quiet time with the Lord, I started visualizing going into a garden to meet with Jesus.   At first it was a garden of healing, and eventually I realized I was going into the garden of my heart.  These conversations really help guide me on my daily walk.  As you know, I have been sharing some of those conversations here. 

Recently, after asking the Holy Spirit to calm my mind and block out all voices except those of God, I "went into" the garden of my heart and spoke to God about the subject of forgiveness.  Immediately I saw two chalkboards.  On one board was a list of people, but before I could even read the names Jesus had erased them all!  How quickly He forgives our sins!  On the other chalkboard were names that I recognized......people I felt had hurt me and who I needed to forgive.  As I erased each name I prayed for strength to forgive and also repented for any part I had played in the situation.  There were two names that were listed at the end...one I will share about next week, and the other was myself.  I prayed over the last name and then moved on to myself.  As I tried to erase my name it kept coming back.  I would erase it and it would pop back up on the chalkboard!  It did not take me long to recognize a truth I have known about the person I see in the mirror ~ I have a hard time forgiving myself.  I am sure you all can relate, and yet God tells us to love ourselves as we love others.  Part of love is forgiveness. 

The conversation on forgiveness really resonated with me.  I know how important it is to let go of past hurts, even though it often takes great effort to do so.  Yesterday this particular conversation came back to me when I was visiting my dear friend, Linny's, blog, A Place Called Simplicity.  I have the privilege of leading Linny's prayer group, The Knee Team, and have come to cherish her friendship. Linny has written a post sharing photos of some of her children with their grandfather.  Not so out of the ordinary unless you know Linny's story which you can find on her blog.  She had a pretty tough childhood and yet, she has forgiven her father and those who brought her harm.  In obedience to God she has forgiven and forged ahead to maintain some kind of relationship with the man who made her childhood more than a little challenging.  In obedience, in forgiveness, in love she has reached out. It would be difficult to do the same, but in fact, I am in the process of forgiving someone who also made my childhood and my adult life challenging at times.  More than she will ever know, Linny has blessed my life as a mentor and a friend during this time. 

The Bible speaks clearly on forgiveness in ways that can seem a bit harsh.  Jesus says,

If you forgive those who sin against you, your heavenly Father will  forgive you.

But if you refuse to forgive others, your Father will not forgive your sins.

Matthew 6: 14,15

NLT

Sometimes forgiveness seems unfair or impossible, but we are not left on our own in this task.  The Holy Spirit helps us to forgive.  The same power that raised Jesus from the dead lives within us and that power gives us the strength to do all things, including letting go of hurts and anger. 

This has come to mind for me during the past week as the stories behind the Aurora, CO shootings come to light.  I pondered how those who lost loved ones will put their lives back together.  I pondered how they will make sense of such madness.  How will they forgive and move forward?  I believe only with God's help will they put their lives in order.  He waits for us to ask.  There are other verses in the book of Matthew that give us guidance. 

Keep on asking and you will receive what you ask for. 

Keep on seeking and you will find. 

Keep on knocking and the door will be opened for you.

Matthew 7:7

As I shared in the beginning of this post, forgiveness is not only for others, but for ourselves. In more ways than one.  Whether it is against ourselves or others, holding unforgiveness in our hearts is harmful in so many ways. God loves us so much that He has given us a strong command with consequences if we do not follow through.  Forgive and be forgiven.  Forgive and be free of hurts. Forgive and have peace. Forgive and be free.  Free in Christ.  I think it is time to go back to that chalkboard and get out the eraser!!



I am linking up with Spiritual Sundays

 

Whispers And Shouts

Sometimes God whispers to us, and sometimes He shouts.  Today is one of those shouting days...I .guess I really needed to hear the message.

During my morning time with God as I visualized sitting at His feet, I asked God what I needed to do concerning a certain situation.  I just did not know what to do anymore.... What came to my mind were these words ~ "But you do know what to do."   I sat with that awhile trying to figure it out....."I really don't, God" was my response.....BUT After spending more time visualizing and meditating on these words, "Forgive" came into my mind.  One word.  Forgive.

A short time later Joel and I had our morning devotions together.  We read from 3 different daily devotional books and spend time reading Max Lucado's book, "Outlive Your Life".  As we began each devotion today, either the scripture or the devotions itself were ALL about forgiveness.  When we opened to the 3rd chapter in Lucado's book the verse was about forgiveness of sins.  Could it be any clearer???

Forgiveness.  I need to forgive others and I need to forgive myself.  This will bring healing and change into my life and it seems I better start working on it right now.  I got the message God. 

Sometimes God whispers, but when necessary He shouts~ loudly!  Over and over! 

Thank you Lord for Your patience, Your love, and Your forgiveness.  As I bring others and myself before you and openly and willingly repent and forgive, heal me in the deep places of my soul.  In Jesus name, Amen.

Flagellants In The Philippines: Lenten Rites

When we lived in the Philippines in the late 70's we experienced a Lenten Ritual that was very memorable. It began during Holy Week when we were driving down into the city next to the Air Force Base. We noticed a man laying on the side of the road. His head was covered in black and some people kicked him as they walked by. We were stunned to see this and confused on why it was happening. The next day we talked to a Filipino friend who explained to us that during Lent ~ especially on Good Friday, Filipino men would lay on the side of the street to be kicked as a punishment by those who passed by, and that there was a procession that took place where men cut their backs with a blade and then whipped their backs with a heavy rope that had several wooden rods attached to the end. The more they bled the better, as they believed that through this ritual their sins were forgiven or divine favors given. We were able to observe this Lenten Rite in the city from the window of our Filipino friend's home on Good Friday. We have never forgotten it.

**We have slides of the Flagellants, so I am using photos I found online and keeping them small so at not to be to disturbing.***

Joel and I have often talked about our experience that Good Friday...so many years ago. We know that each country is different in how they express their faith, and we were guests in a land that was mostly foreign to us, so we knew little about what this Lenten Rite represented. From our own perspective, we often said we wished we could tell these men that they did not need to beat themselves to have forgiveness of sins. Jesus did all the suffering for us! As Christians we need only ask for forgiveness....and because Christ died for our sins we are forgiven and have eternal life!

An important aspect of forgiveness and letting go of resentments was left out of my article yesterday. I left out the fact that it is a process to forgive and let go, and quite often this process takes a great deal of time. Some things take longer to forgive ~ some resentments....some grudges...some of the guilt we carry.....take time. Thus the processing..... The result is still the same ~ peace of mind and a sense of relief and freedom for ourselves. A place of grace.

Grace vs Grief, Grudges, and Guilt

Today I watched Rick Warren at Saddleback Church on my laptop and he talked about forgiveness..I thought I did pretty well with forgiving others and moving on with the people in my life....and then he asked us to think about what people come up in our minds when he asked certain questions.

Like: "What memory do you have that continues to hurt you, and is it connected to another person?" "Is there anyone you blame your problems or unhappiness on?" Or: Who is the 1st person to come to mind when I ask the question, "What is the greatest hurt in your life?" Is there anyone you tend to keep score with...tit for tat....he hurt me first type of thing....And "Do you react negatively to someone because they remind you of someone else?
He brought up grief and sadness over a broken relationship, holding grudges against others, and feeling guilty about our own actions. This is where I had to take a good long look at my own inner self. I had to ask myself whether I was holding resentment towards someone else and was some of my sadness in a certain relationship due to feelings of rejection and lost expectations. I have always known that resentment makes us bitter and unhappy. It is like taking poison and expecting the other person to die. Guilt is a no brainer for me...lots of guilt ~ some real and most a figment of my imagination. I discovered I had some work to do to get to a place of letting go and letting God in certain areas of my life. I desire to come to a place of complete healing through grace.
So I ask you if you have any hidden resentments, grief, anger, or guilt that is holding you back from the pureness of God's love, forgiveness and grace? His amazing grace!!!! Maybe you want to ask the same questions that are listed above, write down or think about your answers and nail them to the cross of Jesus who died for us all. Maybe you want to let go and let God in your relationships and with yourself. Grace is a healing place .....a good place to be.

Letting Go and Getting On

It is the last day of the year...2008 ~ my goodness! I remember when I waited for 2000 and wondered if we really would have some kind of chaos as was predicted...it did not happen. And here we are looking at 2009 already! Before we welcome a new year, I think it is a good time to let go...let go of past resentments, let go of the guilt we may hold on to, let go of disappointments and lost expectations.
"Today is a good day to accept God's forgiving grace for mistakes and shortcomings of the past year and get on with life"~ I just read these words today in a devotional and they seemed to go right along with my posts on forgiveness and resentments. Think how free we will be when we enter a new year without carrying those heavy burdens of guilt and resentment. A fresh start!
I like fresh starts!
May your final day of 2008 be one of peace.

Resentments

Today's reading of our daily devotional brought up the topic of resentment. A woman shared that she had a big pile of papers to be shredded that she had collected over the year, and once she took the time and shredded them, they were gone and forgotten. She decided to do the same at the end of each year with any resentments she had held on to. She wrote the resentments on paper and shredded them ~ soon they were gone and forgotten!
What a great idea!

Faith Expressed: Forgiving Misunderstandings

Ephesians 4:31,32 “Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be put away from you, and be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you.”

In Dr. Charles Swindoll’s radio Bible study entitled “Getting Through The Tough Stuff” he spoke on getting through the tough stuff of misunderstanding someone’s words or intentions. I believe it is one of the most important gifts we can give ourselves, both forgiving ourselves and forgiving others. Dr. Swindoll says, “Without forgiveness you will limp through life with bitterness. Misunderstanding someone’s words or intentions can breed deep seated bitterness which does not easily go away.” Forgiveness must occur if you ever hope to be free of experiences of misunderstanding in your past. Bitterness and forgiveness cannot co-exist. You cannot change the past – but your bitterness can change you!”

At times in our lives we need to take an “inventory” of our feelings surrounding bitterness and resentment and examine the misunderstandings that have caused hurt and pain to ourselves and to others. Then take the time to resolve these issue.

Dr.Robert Schueller, Jr. spoke on resentment recently, also. He said, "There is no room for resentment in our lives. No room for resentment with our friends, family, co-workers, neighbors, and the whole world." I agree that life is too short to harbor resentments, bitterness, and an unforgiving, conditional love lifestyle.

I once received the E-NCOURAGEMENT devotionals via email by Chris Courtney, and he also spoke on bitterness and forgiveness! “Listen”, he said, “all it takes is a tiny seed of bitterness to grow and spread until we go from “bitter” to “embittered”, hardened by our hurts (both real and perceived). All it takes is a little bit of un-forgiveness toward one person: one ex-spouse, one former employer, one parent, one individual who has wronged us or caused us pain and that little bit of un-forgiveness can grow within us and poison our whole outlook, our whole attitude towards family, friends, life in general, and toward God Himself.”

Susan St. James spoke about the death of her son in a plane crash and when a reporter her whether she was angry about his death at the young age of 14, when her older son and her husband survived the crash. Her response has been echoed around the world. “Having resentment is like taking poison and expecting someone else to die.”

Keeping resentments in your heart is deadly.. We may feel like we are getting back at others, or have the right to be angry and unforgiving towards someone because of misunderstandings that have occurred, but the resentments poison us. It will keep relationships from healing and we may cause others to be upset with our bitterness and revenge towards those who have hurt us or we have perceived have hurt us, but these misunderstandings and feelings of resentment will hurt us the most. God knows this, and that may be why he speaks specifically to this issue in the Lord’s Prayer. “And forgive us our debts, as we also have forgiven our debtors..”

In Matthew chapter 18: 22-35(RSV) we find the Law of Forgiveness. Peter asked Jesus how often we are to forgive a brother who continues to sin against me – seven times? Seven times would have been more than Jewish law required, but Jesus replies that we are to forgive others seventy times seven. It seems like an overwhelming task and certainly “not fair”. God is not saying it is easy, but it is necessary.

Forgiveness is so freeing. Where would we be if God did not forgive our sins or our own “misunderstandings” with him?

In Matt: 14, 15 we also read, “For if you forgive men their trespasses, your heavenly Father also will forgive you; but if you do not forgive men their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses.” These verses are given to us at the end of The Lord’s Prayer, and they make it pretty clear how important the act of forgiveness is! Similar verses are found in the books of Mark and Luke also. I believe that God gives us these rules/laws on forgiveness as a loving Father who knows what is best for their child. He loves us so much that He wants us to follow His commands for our own sake.

Chris Courtney said, “God puts within each of us a beautiful garden. WE must tend to our gardens with love and nurturing. We have to pull out the weeds that would threaten our crop. The only way to weed ourselves (spiritually) is through love, through Jesus. Forgiveness pulls out bitterness by the root, and fertilizes the soil of our souls for what God wants to plant within us.”

When I first realized that God was speaking to me through so many avenues on forgiveness, resentment, and bitterness, I knew that God really wanted me to listen, to take this to heart, and search within myself to find those areas that harbor resentments – some hidden even to myself. It is a good time of the year to look within and also set new goals for ourselves. I pray that in sharing this with all of you, it touches your hearts. For I believe that God is asking us to look within and find those areas we need to weed out, those areas that would threaten not only the relationships we have with others or with God himself, but those areas that would keep Him from being able to continue the planting Chris Courtney speaks of – the plans he has for our lives and how we are to serve Him.