The More Revisited

I wrote this article four years ago and just recently re-read it.  I felt the need to share it once again to those who read my blog.  

The More

It all began innocently enough.  She sat on her sofa searching for worship music on her laptop. Scrolling down the many videos available her eyes stopped on one by Heidi Baker and Ruth Fazel.  As she touched the keyboard the most beautiful music filled her ears.  Worship music to Jesus,,, soft, mellow, and so so intimate in ways she did not yet understand

As she stood alone in her living room and sang along, she reached her arms skyward and asked for "more" from Holy Spirit.  More of the Presence in the room, in her body, in her heart.  It began slowly.  A gentle heaviness descended upon her making her move involuntarily.  Soon it was hard to stand so she sat and then it was hard to sit upright so she laid down, letting the Presence of God cover her like an heavy blanket.  A warmth filled her....a peace and sense of contentment and deep love that she longed to hold tightly to.

When this living, breathing blanket came, the Presence moved in.  As days passed there were times her husband needed to help her get around the house, as she continued to be under the Presence of God.  The encounter was at times frightening while at the same time so powerful she did not want it to end.  It was at times confusing while at the same time filled with clarity.  She was experiencing what she did not yet have words for, but knowing it was from God, she surrendered to His will.  Through the encounter, He began the process of the healing she longed for.

Four years later it continues to be difficult for her to describe what occurred during those weeks, as she daily opened her eyes to the glory.  His presence.  Time seemed suspended, yet went by so quickly.  The season of encounter was so intimate, so revealing, so healing as The Presence ebbed and flowed in intensity. doing a graceful dance in her, upon her.  She did not want to live or breathe without it, but slowly the Heavy Blanket subsided and eventually routines returned.  But not to normal.  Nothing could ever go back to what was.  With each sunrise she felt God was with her, but in remembering she could only seek more, ask for more, receive with open arms the More.

(April 2017)

This woman was and is me.  So much has happened since I wrote this eight years ago, but I still find it difficult to explain.  Recently I have been reading a book by Kathy Vallotton where she describes a similiar experience and I found myself nodding my head in agreement.  Yes.  Being "under the Spirit" as she defined it.  Here is the bottom line regarding this experience.........I did not want it to end and I have longed for more of this type of experiences and am still waiting.  I know deep in my heart it was from God and I believe that during this season of encountering Holy Spirit,  healing was taking place deep within my soul.  

There is always more mystery to God, more to God than we could ever understand.  We need to only trust Him in this journey called life.  Trust Him in the good times, the bad time, the ugly times.........the mysterious times.  

I am Walking Beside You

"Nothing, 

Nothing will ever stop Me from pursuing you

Why question My hand in your life?

Letters to the Unforgottten

by Ana Werner

Celebrating In A Courtyard, Online, and In Our Memories

On Sunday we headed to church outside in the courtyard of a local Lutheran Church.  It was great to be back in the midst of worshipers, and to top it all off it was Pentecost Sunday!  The pastor gave a great sermon, speaking about the day the Christian church began, the gifts of speaking in other languages and how we could learn a little from the Pentecostals who are a bit more "animated" in their worship.  Joel and I had to chuckle, as memories came back from many years ago when we first learned about such gifts of Holy Spirit as speaking in tongues.   

I have shared before that in 1972-74 we were stationed in Duluth where we often went to a Lutheran church on Sunday mornings and an  Assembly of God church in the evenings with friends we met in the Air Force, It was at the Duluth Tabernacle that I first heard someone speak in a prayer language during prayer time.  I remember clearly feeling such a sense of peace and God's presence in that prayer room where the women gathered to pray.  I wanted "some of that" peace, but my search went unanswered during that time.

In 1974 we headed to The Philippine Islands where I became friends with a woman who also prayed in tongues and then I became involved with a group of women who would often meet at the base commander's home to pray and worship.  This gathering was always something I looked forward to, this place where worship, praise, prayer and healing took place.  I experienced my own physical healing at one of these meetings.  My desire for this "something more" only grew, but still, when I talked to Joel about this gift of a prayer language his answer was " I don't know, we are Lutheran". 

So, 40 years later.............from the time I first was drawn to this way of praying..........YES, forty years later God blessed me with my own prayer language about a month after once again I had asked Joel what he thought of a teaching we watched on healing and the gifts of the Holy Spirit....and Joel had once again said, "I am Lutheran, I don't know what I would do with that."  Joel went to bed that night and woke at 4am healed completely from Lyme and other conditions and sure enough, God gave him the gift of a prayer language even though He did not ask for it.  I am thinking maybe God got tired of hearing Joel's response to my questions and thought He would help him know what to do with that!

So, as we listened to the pastor speak we had to smile as we recalled our own journeys with powerful Pentecost and Holy Spirit gifts.  After church we headed home to watch online worship from Lutheran Church of Hope where we "attend" virtually every week.  Pastor Mike Householder preached and taught on Pentecost and the gifts of the Spirit!  Two great sermons that spoke volumes to us, and took us back to the before and after seasons of our lives.  Both seasons of our lives important for our faith journey.  Both a blessing.  

Yes, as I have shared before, we have experienced miracles of healing and watched God heal others over the past few years.  We have experienced Holy Spirit and God's Presence in tangible ways.  We have also watched and waited for healings and change and continue to do so.  None of the later keeps us away from knowing God's faithfulness and power in our lives and it shouldn't. 

Yesterday someone spoke to Joel at church and told us he had read Joel's book.  Joel said, "So, it is a little to the right of crazy?", and this man Joel has known for 25 years replied, "Yes, it is."  There were things he did not agree with.  Joel desires all feedback from those who have read "A Little To The Right of Crazy".   We deeply appreciated him buying the book and reading it.  Joel wrote this book and self published it because he believes Holy Spirit led him to do so. What is in Joel's book has a strong Biblical foundation and more importantly it was written because of the need to be obedient to God.   Over three years ago we were told by someone who walks prophetically that he saw a picture of us "rocking a boat"  He asked us if we "rocked boats" and we both had to laugh and answer yes, in our world we do.  He then said, "God does not want you to stop rocking the boat.  Don't stop rocking the boat.  When you stop it will be time for you to "go home".  

So nine years later we still talk about Joel's healing, and my own healing from Lyme.  We talk about the gifts of speaking in tongues....a prayer language only Holy understands.  We talk about the visions God gives me.  We do so as boldly as we can without being pushy or overbearing, but we do not let what others think or say get in the way.  We have been told to rock boats.  Sometimes that means our own boats are rocking.  I believe God wants to rock our boats....He has not called us to keep Him in a tidy box labeled with our ideas of who He is.  Sometimes He does not want us comfortable.....Sometimes He brings Pentecost to us.

Speaking of Pentecost and the birthing of the Christian Church, I am thinking that a lot of boats were rocked  on that first Pentecost.  I would have loved to have been there and experience what the disciples did on that day!  It must have been amazing. I hope and pray that no matter what comes my way, I never forget that God is always with us.  His Presence can be palpable.  His power and authority miraculous.  And His gifts for His children absolutely delightful.  Grateful that after forty years  of wandering and seeking we have experienced our own bit of Pentecost.  

The River Runs Through

I first wrote this four years ago but felt the need to repost it.  During this season of all our lives, we need Holy Spirit more than ever.  Come Holy Spirit, come. 

God has been highlighting Ezekiel 47 to Joel and me the past week.  In this chapter the prophet Ezekiel is shown by an angel the water that was flowing from God's Temple.  The angel first shows Ezekiel where it is coming from, and then he measures it..... first ankle deep, then knee deep, then chest deep, and then over his head.  On either side of this river 12 fruit trees are growing and they produce new fruit every month of the year because they are watered by the Temple river.  The leaves on these trees are used for medicine. It is a very interesting prophetic vision given to the prophet Ezekiel for Israel.

 God's references to a river first started on September 19th (2016), a few days before our river flooded here in town. While meditating  I saw Joel by a river, fishing on the side of the bank.  He then put his pole down and took off his boots and socks, rolled up his pants and got into the river.  He waded around for a while and then immersed himself in the river.  While in the water Joel noticed a small waterfall where a fresh stream was flowing into the river.  He climbed out and started walking up the hill to find its source.  He came up to a huge boulder flecked with gold that was at least a 60 feet high. The water reflected off the dark colored rocks as it trickled down, forming a stream and then ending up in the river.  I then saw God's hands come out from the rock and He laid them on Joel's head.  As He did so I noticed that Joel's hair was dark black, like when he was young.  I heard "I have anointed you to preach the gospel, heal the sick, cast out demons, and raise the dead."  Joel then turned around and he could see his life from this starting place and as it went down to the river.  On either side he could see things that he had been protected from, and as his life journey progressed the path got wider and wider.  At the end the path split looking like arms raised in praise to God.  I then heard the prayer of Jabez..."Oh Lord, that you would bless me indeed.  Enlarge my territory.  Let your hand be with me, and keep me from harm so that I will be free from pain." (And God granted him his request.)   

What God showed me that morning led me to read Ezekiel 47 again, and then another devotional we read also mentioned the river of God.  I remembered something similar in Heidi Baker's book, "Birthing the Miraculous" so Joel and I went back and read the chapter "Deeper Still", based on Ezekiel 47. We prayed that God would keep revealing to us what He wanted us to know about this river, because when we get the same message more than 2-3 times we know we are to pay attention.

Later that same day I went to Bethel Church's site and noticed that they were premiering the movie "Holy Spirit Reborn", so Joel and I decided to watch it.  I mentioned it in a previous post.  About half way through an evangelist from a South African villages spoke about how God came to him as a boy and led him to become a Christian.  He spent his time bringing Jesus and His healing power to the villages.  He talked about how Holy Spirit came into his life, sharing that Holy Spirit is like a flowing river.  He went on to that that when we are in a river we cannot control where it takes us, the current does that....and it is the same with Holy Spirit.  He takes us with Him and we are not in control, but we can trust Him with the journey.  He ended by saying "God is our Father and Creator, Jesus is our Savior, and Holy Spirit has been placed here in us and on earth now to empower and love us.   He wants us to surrender and let Him work through us in others."

So we know when we are just wading in a river ankle deep we can be in control of what is going on. When we are in knee deep we still have that control.  Waist deep as and it gets harder to go where we want to go.  Then when the water is up to our necks, we are not in control of where the river current takes us.  It is also the same with Holy Spirit.  When God asks us to surrender to Him and His plans for our lives, do we just wade in that, or do we immerse ourselves, trusting God to take us where He desires us to go.....trusting Holy Spirit as He blesses us.  Loving us, empowering us with that river of Living Water to be used by God for His plan and purpose.

Pastor Seth Dahl says that Holy Spirit is never shown to be a depersonalized force.  He is God.  He wants an intimate relationship with us. He is not an "it".  He is Holy.  Part of the Trinity.  Not just a wind.....but God's breath, living, powerful, and personal.  When Jesus left this earth he told the disciples that God was sending them someone to help them do even more than He had done.  Come Holy Spirit, come.

When God Interrupts Your Plans

                                                                         

Recently I picked up a book to re-read that has graced our book shelf for the past 8 years.  It is written by Guidepost author and editor John Sherrill, titled "They Speak In Other Tongues".  It was first written in 1965 and re-published with an addition in 2004.  I guess you could define this post as a book review with our personal story attached.  

This book came into our home and changed our lives after Joel was healed overnight from Lyme and several other health problems.  He was given a complete "divine overhaul" at 4 am on a January morning.  With his healing came a gift that he was not looking for~ his own prayer language.  Joel and I had watched two hours of a video from a pastor/teacher who spoke on "God wanting you well" the night before Joel was miraculously healed. He had mentioned speaking in tongues during his teaching so at that time I had asked Joel what he thought of the gift found in the New Testament and he told me, "I am Lutheran, I don't know what I would do with it."  But God had other plans.  With Holy Spirit showing up in a big way, I began to do some research for Joel on "what to do with it" and this book by John Sherrill came to my attention.  I am so glad it did.

John Sherrill and his wife Elizabeth have both written several best sellers and started their own publishing company.  They were also editors at Guideposts magazine in NYC.  John began learning about speaking in tongues through his interactions with Ruth Peale whose husband Norman Vincent Peale is well known for his work as a pastor, author of "The Power of Positive Thinking", and creator of Guideposts Magazine.  (we have gotten this monthly magazine for decades).  When Sherrill began his research he was a skeptic who was writing a story and had no interest at all in the gifts of the Spirit, but his quest to find out what this was all about changed their lives forever.  God interrupted their plans for His own.  And the book he wrote changed our lives forever too.  It gave us a deeper understanding of what a prayer language is and how God uses it to build us up and bring us closer to Him.  

I have had people tell me with a dismissive air that "it is the least of the gifts, you know."  Others have said they wondered if it was from the devil.  Was it really real?  We cannot deny that it is right there in our Bibles or that it existed then and still exists today.  When Joel first spoke of it to our Synod here, they were disturbed by what he had to say.  Later on we learned that 5 of Joel's pastor colleagues had this "gift" but did not talk about it to others.  It certainly can stir things up when it is mentioned in our Lutheran world.  And yet, there it is in Acts and in I Corinthians where Paul speaks about it.

I have been enjoying Sherrill's book once again as I read about his research, his experiences, his conclusions and how it all shaped their lives.  God never leaves us where we are, He has bigger plans for us than we could ever imagine.  We are both grateful for the gift of a prayer language as a way to worship and praise God, a way to pray when we don't know what to pray, a way to grow and "edify" ourselves as the scripture claims.  It may seem a  "little to the right of crazy" for some, but for us it is now just part of our prayer life.  For us it is a time when "one's own spirit and the Holy Spirit are in communion and that is a good thing.

I would recommend this book to anyone who is curious or interested in what having the gift of speaking in tongues is all about.  John Sherrill has passed away now, but he and his wife "Tib" have a firm faith and solid foundation behind them.  They co-authored such books as Brother Andrew's "God's Smugglers" and Corrie TenBoom's book "The Hiding Place".  They are the kind of people you wish you could sit down with for a long visit and listen to all they have experienced in their lives.  

Saturday: Heaven's Heartbeat

Papa..........Papa God?  Can I come sit on your lap and will You just hold me close?  I know you will.  As I lean my head against your chest will you quiet my rapid heart while I listen to the beating of the heart of your Spirit realm.  A Heavenly pulse is needed at this time to keep a steady firm beat in this chaotic moment.  Let me listen to Your rhythm, Your Voice, and what You are saying as I come to you.

"The moment we get tired in the waiting, 

God's Spirit is right along side,  helping us. 

If we don't know how or what to pray it doesn't matter.

 He does our praying in and for us, 

making prayer out of our wordless sighs,

 our aching groans."  

Romans 8:26  

The Message

Sighs come forth as I rest against you.  Sighs of relief and sighs of weeping and mourning.  You tell us in Your Word that when we don't know what to pray, Your Spirit prays for us.  We need that Papa God.  We need Your Spirit to intercede for us, for our families, for our cities, our country, our world.

I am worried, Papa....I am more than worried, I am scared for our children.  For your children.  I am especially worried for our sons.  Your sons.  Our son you created as a black man, who lives in the Minneapolis suburbs.  A man who loves You and wants the best for his own son.  He is especially feeling the pain, the frustration, the chaos.  Hold him close and let Him rest against You. And our son You created as a white man with a calling on his heart to be a police officer.  A man dedicated to serve and protect his community, and now seen by many as the enemy.  Hold him close and let Him rest against you. Shield them both.

Papa, so many people in our country are divided, so broken.  Divided politically, religiously, racially, financially, and in ways I can't even comprehend.  We have all contributed to this mess, and for that I repent, Papa.  Show me the way to go.  When I rest in Your arms, it smooths the edges, and gives me hope.  We need hope Papa.....we need You.  Let me rest in Your arms, yet a little longer.  Let us all rest in your arms as we hear the heartbeat of Heaven and seek Your kingdom here on earth. 

Doing The Hard Thing

Ann Voskamp, mother, wife, international speaker and author, writes a blog titled, A Holy Experience.  Recently she wrote about doing the next hard thing in difficulties.  That the only way to climb the mountain before us, no matter what it is,  is to take the next step.  And that requires doing the hard things that lay before us.

 It kind of describes a portion of my life in a nutshell.  Every one of the five surgeries I went through from November to mid June were challenging, whether due to being in the midst of the strong hormonal treatments for cancer, or having parts of my body cut off with the double mastectomy.  Each recovery has had its own challenges too, with the December disaster as we call it where the surgery completely failed leaving me with a long journey back.  Then two more kidney stone surgeries while fighting kidney infections.  And then the mastectomy.  The cancer was removed along with both breasts and 26 nodes which has left a big cavity under my arm and has me doing daily exercises to regain the flexibility of both arms. Cutting all those nerves and muscles triggered a big flare up on ongoing nerve pain.  Yeah....hard things.  When I look back on the past 9 months I am still amazed by it all.  And grateful.

So, don't take this post to be a lament about how hard my life is or that no one has it as bad as me........Seriously?  Being 71 and also being a pastor's wife, I know how many people get up every day and do the hard thing before them.  And on a broader scale, each and every one of us have to face hard things at some time in our lives.  We all find ourselves taking the next step forward in order to climb over or conquer the mountain before us.  It may look impossible  ~your situation~ but like Ann Voskamp says, "every Everest is scaled by simply putting one foot in front of the other." This Bible verse from The Message Bible tells us where we get the help we need.

"God will help you deal with whatever hard things 

come up when the time comes."

Matthew 6:34

In doing the hard things, we need to hold close the truth that comes to us from God's Word.  God helps us.  He not only helps us but He has given us a powerful tool,  Holy Spirit.  He empowers us, enlightens us, guides us.  Holy has been called the Helper. (John 14).  As you and I do the hard things let us never forget we are not alone.  The Helper gives us what we need when we need it most. 

Don't Leave Home Without Him!

It was five years ago about mid January that I began feeling the presence of Holy Spirit in a physical way.  I don't really know how to explain it well and when I try my words fall short.  I was worshiping one morning when suddenly I could not stand up.  I felt a weight on me that pressed me down to the sofa.  As I continued to worship, His presence became stronger and stronger.  I literally felt God like a heavy blanket on me.  This did not last just a few minutes, but actually went on throughout the day for a few weeks.  Most of what I experienced during this time I have kept between Joel and myself, but it changed my life forever.

I have pondered the purpose of this time, and I believe that Holy Spirit was bringing about inner healing for me from childhood trauma.  He was also letting me know how much God loves me, body, soul, and spirit.  Oh, I felt so very very loved.

Holy Spirit has been defined as a wind, a comforter, and dynamite to name just a few.  God gave us the Holy Spirit when Jesus left this earth. He told His disciples to attempt nothing until they had been given the Holy Spirit.  There is power there.   And Holy Spirit loves to communicate with us.  He enjoys helping, guiding, and leading us. He is mostly a gentleman who waits for permission to make Himself known.  There is so much available for us if we just open our hearts to the possibilities.

I love the quote above.  We DO need Holy when we go to Walmart........to Target.........the grocery store.........church.......school.............in our home.  We need Him 24/7 in our lives.  And He is always  there  We may not always feel him, but He is always always there.   He still "nudges" me as He did five years ago, and I still open my heart to Him.  "Come Holy Spirit Come".  Sometimes I long for those weeks of His intense Presence, but mostly I am grateful for how much that period of time shaped me and my relationship with God.   Here is an article I wrote about that special time.  More

My advice?  Don't leave home without Him!

A Steady Diet

When we were staying at the home of Bethel members in Redding CA, the hosts would have beautiful worship music on their TV flooding the house.  Our room was right up front, a sunroom made into a lovely bedroom, so we could hear the music by Julie True ~ so soft and soothing. 

Worship music that soothes and relaxes.  Joel listens to  "elevator music" whenever he is in the office working.  I decided since he is much more relaxed than me, I need to take his advice and find my own ways to bring peace into my days.

I love Bethel music but a steady diet of it is not relaxing.  I love Julie True, but a steady diet of it keeps me from getting things done.  I guess it is a lot like other things in our lives.  For instance, pancakes!  I love almond flour pancakes with almond butter, fresh strawberries and blueberries and topped with coconut whipping cream.  A steady diet of it would take my apple shape to a whole new level.  I like reading and watching murder mysteries, but a steady diet of them would have me jumping at every noise I hear.

There are a few things we do need a steady diet of.......you know where I am going here. We need a steady diet of God's Word, prayer, worship, and interaction.  We need a steady diet of Papa God in our lives, nourishing us.  Yes. 

A daily diet of picking up the love story that God wrote and fills our heart.  Do you remember writing or receiving love letters to or from someone special?  They warmed our hearts and put a smile on our face.  Well, God's Word is filled with love letters to His kids.  They touch our hearts, change our lives.

A daily diet of giving our Creator thanks and praise.  Praise is a way to communicate with our Father.  It is a weapon of warfare.  It shifts the atmosphere around us and in us.

A daily diet of prayer.  Talking to our God about all our needs, desires, dreams, hopes, and listening.  Quietly listening and looking for Him to show up.  He is always communicating with us, we just need to tune in.  Ask, seek, and you will find. 

A daily diet of worship.  Lifting our voices, our hearts, our eyes to our God.  It takes the focus off our our circumstances and on to the One who Heals, Saves, Loves. 

A daily intentional stepping into a relationship with Him.  He is always with us.  He lives IN us for Heaven's sake.  Well, really for our sake.  Share with Him just like you do your spouse or loved ones.  Let Him love on you...........

This is the kind of steady diet we need to be nourished ~ body, soul and spirit. 

A Tuesday Scribble: GPS, Hawks, and House Slippers!

Today we headed west to a National wildlife reserve about 1 1/2 hours from here.  We are preparing for our trip to CA this fall, and wanted to get a "Lifetime Senior Pass" to all the national parks across the country.  They are only $10, but soon will cost $80.  So we packed a lunch and headed out about 10:30 am.  It took us 2 hours because we decided to use my phone's GPS which kept trying to send us right into the middle of the Union Slough.  Glub glubbbbb.................After listening to our lady tell us over and over to turn where there were no roads.....I googled the office to find the "address" of the Union Slough and we finally drove right to it.  Yep.  Well, at least that is our story and we are sticking to it.

Gold Eagle on Slough

When we arrived, Joel stepped out of the van and started to chuckle.  It seems he had forgotten to exchange his house "slippers" for his tennis shoes.  No one could really tell the difference, but us.  Maybe he just likes to wear slip-on's, ya know?  Along with his old cowboy hat for which I have no good feelings!  I would like to accidentally sit on it, but so far Joel has kept it far away from my reclining bum.

Between the GPS fiasco and the slippers incident, we decided we need to get our act together before the trip west or our kids will worry while we are gone.  It would not be the first time.........I remember when we were going to New York City and our oldest said, "My parents are going to get on a subway and never be heard from again!"  Of course we had not traveled for many years then due to Lyme, but I'm just sayin'.  On that same trip we "somehow" got off the interstate we were on and found ourselves heading straight into Chicago.  North instead of West.  I am the navigator Joel is the driver......we both were at fault.  Sigh...  We made an "urgent" call to our oldest and asked here the best route through the windy city since she and her family had lived there for 10 years.......so maybe she has reason to worry?

While at the Wildlife Refuge today we sat overlooking the slough watching the many kinds of ducks and birds.  Seeing an eagle and a hawk, heron, terns, geese, and more.  What I noticed was just how quiet it was.  The silence really speaks loudly at times, doesn't it.  As we sat eating our lunch and observing nature we talked about Joel's 4 years of summers working for the wildlife refuge in Minnesota.  His first two year degree was in wildlife management and he spent his days banding ducks, building fences or taking old fences out...........sometimes up to his neck in the water (hoping not to get "swimmer's itch".  So many years ago, yet so many memories surfacing.

Black-eyed Susans

While getting our passes Joel mentioned he once worked in a refuge in MN.  The clerk asked Joel how he ended up in Iowa and he told her he was in the military, then the seminary and his work as a pastor brought him to Iowa.  She replied, "What an interesting life!"  When we got outside I turned to Joel and replied, "She has no idea!"  It has definitely been an interesting life ~ good, bad, and a bit ugly.  Through it all God has been faithful.

With all that has gone in the family lately........my sister's heart attack and 6 bypasses, Gr. Jo's fall hitting the coffee table, my surgery for melanoma.......I think all our kids are looking ahead and pondering what the future holds and how the heck do "things" get handled from afar.  Yeah. No one plans to trip and fall........to suddenly need open heart surgery...........to have their world turn upside down.  It is not healthy to worry continually about those unexpected things, but it is good to think about and make some kind of plan for the what ifs or eventual needs.  Unless you are like our neighbor who continues to amaze us.  At 87 she is out raking, mowing, hauling rock in here wheelbarrow, trimming trees.....I love it!  She gives us all hope!

What a day..............We can only laugh and look forward to our next adventure with God making sure Holy comes along for the ride........and learning from our mistakes.  Like, don't forget your shoes!  And bring along an atlas cuz the GPS lady gets lost too!

The Shack Within Us All

Wm Paul Young, author of The Shack, spoke at a recent Bethel conference on creativity.  He was a powerful speaker, even with his tendency to wander off on a rabbit trail.  I expect that is the creative side of him.  He shared quite a bit of his story, which made an impact on all his listeners.  His parents were missionaries in the highlands of New Guinea with the Dani tribe that had it's own language, worshiped spirits, and practiced cannibalism. He was raised til age 6 mostly by the tribe, as his parents were busy doing mission work.  He remembered hearing the tribe members discuss whether or not to kill his parents, but said he never felt afraid because he considered himself to be part of the tribe!  His first language was the language of the tribe they lived among.  Sadly, the tribe had as part of their secret culture, sexual abuse, and he did not escape that.  It continued when at age 6 he went away to boarding school, where abuse occurred by some of the older boys in the dormitory.  Being away from his parents, and his "people" was very difficult.

Besides the sexual abuse, having a strict, physically abusive father added to his belief that he was a bad person, who was never perfect enough for his dad or anyone else.   He believed the lie that all that happened to him was "his fault".  He kept all this secret from his family.  Finally, at the age of 38, after struggling with addictions and his wife discovering his 3 month affair with her best friend, he hit rock bottom and all his secrets poured out. From this place at the bottom he began his healing journey.  His history and 11 years of healing from his past gave him an unusual perspective of God.  His wife suggested he write his personal faith story so his children would understand who he is and how he thinks.  The result was "The Shack", written originally just for his family and a few close friends.  God had other plans, though, and the rest is history with more than 20 million books having been sold to this date.

Paul Young's story is important to hear because you can see the redemption in it.  His story holds within it the power of the cross.  All our stories do.  During the conference he told everyone that the shack in his book represents the inner person within each of us.  It was an "aha" moment for both Joel and myself and resolved some of the mystery of his novel.   Just like the book and movie reveals, I believe that the "shack" within us is where Papa God, Jesus, and Holy Spirit meet us to provide healing, love, forgiveness, and new life in Christ.

It may for some, be difficult to uncover what the "shack" within holds close to the heart.  We may believe the lies that our story shared will make people think less of us, uncovering our history will be too painful or selfish, or we will be misunderstood.  Hiding our stories gives us a false sense of living in a perfect, air-brushed, Instagram/Facebook world. It leaves us living with an inner shack that is falling down around us.  Let your story be told!  Sharing our stories is not done to point the finger, gain sympathy, or encourage us to live as a victim.  Just the opposite.  There may be a fine line between dwelling on your past and using your past to show God's love for you then and now, but God tells us our stories are very important because He walks in the midst of them and through our history the power of the cross is seen.  Giving Him the glory reveals our redemption and victory in Papa God!

Mac, in the book and movie, was able to find healing within after tragedy.  Wm. Paul Young was able to find healing, redemption, and a deeper relationship with Papa God by walking through his own "valley".   Their stories beckon us to share our own, seeking the Healer and the healing needed with Papa guiding the way.  May God's love and healing power be revealed in the story of each of His children.

Invitations From God

Last week we shared our healing stories with the community church group we are a part of.  They have been gathering for nearly 2 years, but we joined just last fall.  We were asked to share our stories, so we did!

Sometimes it is difficult to look back at those dark times in our life.  Especially when Joel and I were both so sick.  Sometimes I listen to the lies that have me running from what is already gone.  Fear can creep in when I look back on the wrong thing.  Yes, Lyme is evil.  The enemy uses it to kill, steal, and destroy, and it nearly destroyed both Joel and my lives.  But God!  Once we opened our eyes to the revelation of His Word on healing........everything changed.

I'll soon be reading and reviewing a book by Bonnie Gray, entitled, "Whispers of Rest".  Her first book, "Finding Spiritual Whitespace" has helped many people walk through difficult times.  Bonnie was a well educated and successful business woman who suddenly was controlled by panic attacks due to childhood trauma that surfaced.....but God had other plans.  God invited her to open her heart to healing and she stepped out into the more He offered and is now empowering others with what she learned on her journey.  Only God.

My friend Katherine was battling Lyme disease and the many antibiotics, supplements and herbs she was taking did not heal her broken body.  She listened to a teaching about God wanting us well, felt led by God, and took a bold step in obedience ~ throwing out the many bottles lining her counter, relying on prayer for healing.  She is now a mom of 5 beautiful babies, active in her church and community, and doing so well.  She opened her heart and her eyes to seeing God's Word in a new way..........and everything shifted.  She also shared her journey with us and for that we are eternally grateful.

I listened to a woman share her story of how she ended up living in Redding California.  She kept having dreams where she would see a city surrounded by mountains.  She was living in the south and her life was challenging at the time.  She kept seeing this place but had no idea where it was.  She heard about Bethel, decided to go to a conference there, and as she came into the city it took her breath away.  Here was the city of her dreams.  Against any arguments, she knew she was to follow God's calling.  She moved there and attended their school of ministry.  Her life changed at God's invitation.

Recently I shared a story her about how Holy Spirit invited me into "something more" with Him. The many weeks that we walked together in a divine encounter is hard to explain, but I did attempt to do so here.  People may be uncomfortable with what I shared, but God told me clearly that I am not to worry about what others think, or try to please man in anyway.  I am to obey Him.  This is a challenging invitation from God........letting go of what people think.  The need for approval from others.  I can look back and see some of the ways it is beginning to happen..........in what I write.......in what I share......in my creative worship dancing....in Bible journaling.  Only God.

What is God inviting you into right now?  He is always welcoming us into something!  Whether it is a closer relationship with Him, obedience, a new art, a new land, healing, or more.  We need to be keeping our ears and eyes open to His guidance and direction, His invitation for the more.  Can you hear Him beckoning you into more?

The More

It all began innocently enough.  She sat on her sofa searching for worship music on her laptop. Scrolling down the many videos available her eyes stopped on one by Heidi Baker and Ruth Fazel.  As she touched the keyboard the most beautiful music filled her ears.  Worship music to Jesus,,, soft, mellow, and so so intimate in ways she did not yet understand.

As she stood alone in her living room and sang along, she reached her arms skyward and asked for "more" from Holy Spirit.  More of the Presence in the room, in her body, in her heart.  It began slowly.  A gentle heaviness descended upon her making her move involuntarily.  Soon it was hard to stand so she sat and then it was hard to sit upright so she laid down, letting the Presence of God cover her like an heavy blanket.  A warmth filled her....a peace and sense of contentment and deep love that she longed to hold tightly to.

When this living, breathing blanket came, the Presence moved in.  As days passed there were times her husband needed to help her get around the house, as she continued to be under the Presence of God.  The encounter was at times frightening while at the same time so powerful she did not want it to end.  It was at times confusing while at the same time filled with clarity.  She was experiencing what she did not yet have words for, but knowing it was from God, she surrendered to His will.  Through the encounter, He began the process of the healing she longed for.

Four years later it continues to be difficult for her to describe what occurred during those weeks, as she daily opened her eyes to the glory.  His presence.  Time seemed suspended, yet went by so quickly.  The season of encounter was so intimate, so revealing, so healing as The Presence ebbed and flowed in intensity. doing a graceful dance in her, upon her.  She did not want to live or breathe without it, but slowly the Heavy Blanket subsided and eventually routines returned.  But not to normal.  Nothing could ever go back to what was.  With each sunrise she felt God was with her, but in remembering she could only seek more, ask for more, receive with open arms the More.

The Shack

A couple of weeks ago we went to the movie, The Shack, based on the novel of the same name by Canadian author William Paul Young.   William Paul Young spent the first 10 years of his life in New Guinea with his missionary parents.  He wrote this book to write down his own perspectives on God and the inner healing that took place in him as an adult, and more importantly as a gift for his family and a few friends.  It was never intended to be public, but God had other plans.  Joel and I purchased the book several years ago and found it a powerful read.

We headed with several from our community group to meet at the local theater where we relaxed in soft red leather recliners to watch this amazing book unfold on the big screen.  Some people find this story offensive or sacrilegious, and get hung up on the fact that Papa God is portrayed through most of the movie by a black woman, Jesus is middle eastern, and Holy Spirit is an Asian woman named Siri.   Joel and I discussed how easy it is to put God in a box, and how frightening it is for some to see Him out of the comfort zone we create around our faith.  Been there myself.

By our standards we found the theology expressed pretty accurate............and does that statement itself not put God in our own box??  What came across in the movie and the book is how much the Trinity truly loves us.  ALL of them loving ALL of us.  In the movie Papa, Jesus, and Holy express how important having a relationship with us is.  Something fully backed by scripture.  Forgiveness is also a theme that runs throughout, along with knowing we are never alone.

I love how God, Jesus, and Holy Spirit are presented, although in our experience Holy is more than a comforter.  Holy is more of a whirlwind and a dynamo in our lives, but since Holy is a gentleman, He meets us where we are.

I can hardly wait to see this movie again.  There are many powerful statements made that resonate, like the one above, as and I am sure we did not catch everything the first time through.  Next time I will bring a pen and paper and more tissue!  Young wrote this particular book from a place of his own deep pain and losses transformed and healed by our Papa God.  I believe that is why it resonates with so many people.  He tries to answer the question, "If God is so good, why is there so much pain and suffering in the world? "   It is a question we all have pondered.

In fact there are many questions to be pondered within The Shack.  When I first read the book, I was not on the journey I am on now in my faith, so while looking back I'm thinking that God planted some seeds in me several years ago with this book .  Seeds that sprouted and grew slowly within. Opening me up to the "something more" I still look for.   He is good about that. He is just plain good.

Surprise!!!

My sister Jan just turned 80.  Looking at the picture below she is the one on your left (just in case it is hard to tell).  It is pretty obvious she looks younger than most 80 year old women.  No offense to anyone in their eighth decade of life.  She looks younger than me and I am 11 years behind her.

 Recently her husband Lanny gave her a surprise birthday gathering in Nashville....it was a surprise because all of her kids and his, along with spouses and a girlfriend came to celebrate with her.  Most of them showed up at their condo door to say...."Surprise!"  She had no clue.  Absolutely none.  She opened the door and there they stood.  She said it took her a while to process........  From all the pictures I have seen it looks like they had a great time celebrating!  As it should be.  It is a wonderful feeling to be surrounded by your people and blanketed with love.

Blanketed with love.....this is what God does for us, too.  And sometimes he knocks on our door and says "surprise".  I can't help but think back about when we first "found" Praise Church here in town.  God knew what was coming and I believe 100% that he sent us there in preparation for the months to come.  We thought we were moving to Arizona, so when we first went to Praise I remember saying to Joel..."Why would God give us this church now when we are leaving?"  Well, of course cancer showed up on a mammogram and the rest is as they say, history.  Was cancer the surprise from God?  Nope.  Nada.  Never.  The enemy attacked me with the cancer, but GOD'S surprise was the provision of His blessings through a church where we could express our love of Christ in the praise music, the charismatic, the prophetic, and especially the healing.   He is always ahead of us preparing the way, fighting our battles, making all things work out for good.  He just loves us that much.

Just the other day Joel was driving back roads to a church and saw for the first time a red fox in a white field along the side of the road.  He loves red foxes.  God often surprises Him with an animal in nature when he least expects it, but definitely needs a love tap from His Father.  It is a way they communicate......through nature.  God telling Joel, I've got this.  Just enjoy the blessings.  Joel was delighted with God's surprise of a red fox greeting his Sunday morning!

Another surprise?  Joel's immediate, one-minute-sick- next minute-well healing.  Recently we celebrated the 5th anniversary of the miracle and I gave him a cute card I had found in Arizona 2 years ago.

Inside it says, "There, all better!  Can I get an Amen!"  It is meant to be funny.....but it was just about the way it happened for Joel.  That fast.  That simple.  A revelation of God's love and Holy's power within us, released.  Healing and Holy gifts.  Wow!   Surprise!  Now go out and surprise others with what you have learned.

Our Papa God delights in surprising us with an abundance of His love blessings all around us.  Some cannot be contained and must be shared.  Some come in the form of a red fox........a place of the prophetic and healing......a gathering of family blanketing you with love.  Look for His surprise blessings on your life today.......they are all around you just waiting to be discovered.  Surprise!

Saturday's Scribbles: Who You Gonna Call?

About a week ago we started the morning off with a water issue.  Joel showered and when he got out he noticed water on the floor of the bathroom leaking out from around the toilet.  Yikes....gross.  He came upstairs and said, "I think we will need a new seal or a new toilet."  He cleaned it up the mess, started a load of clothes and............yep, you guessed it.  Water came up the drain.

Our first thought was the issue had something to do with the ice storm, but Joel soon came to the conclusion that we needed Rota Rooter to come to the rescue.  And they did.  Very quickly in fact.  The clog was a tree root that was way out from the house.  They fought with the root....and won!  Water problem solved to the tune of................well, lets just say it was not for free, but worth it.

I love how my husband responds to circumstances that arise.........he just hums his way through them, doing what you gotta do.  He knows his limitations and calls in the Calvary when it is out of his expertise.  That would apply across the board with any major electrical stuff, too.  He learned that lesson way back in the late 1970's.

We lived in a very old house and there was an electrical issue....so Joel headed to the basement to fix it.  It nearly fixed him!  As he stood holding what he did not realize was  a"hot" wire in his hands he heard a noise, glanced up and saw the current come down the wire.  He quickly let go just at it exploded and left hot metal melting on his glasses.  Yeah.  That close.

There are things we can do for ourselves, and there are things that require the experts!  I would say that applies not only for things in the natural, but in the spiritual.  It would be why Jesus told us he was leaving us a comforter.  Someone to help us, empower us.  He knew we would need an expert to navigate living life as Christians.  He stated that those left behind would be doing even more than He did.  Well, we would need help to accomplish that!  That is how good Holy Spirit is!

We have experienced Holy showing up so often as we have needed that help.  Never left alone, He waits, we seek, He responds.  It is so great to have Him there for us, isn't it?

So whether in water and electrical issues, or in living life, we have the option to rely on the experts to help us out!  We can pick up the phone and dial Rota Rooter and we can pick up the "phone" and dial God for h.e.l.p.

I think of a line in a silly song from a movie...."Who you gonna call??  Ghostbusters!"  Who we gonna call when life throws things our way?  Holy Spirit!  He cleans up messes, empowers us, comforts us, and yeah.....He truly is a ghostbuster if you need that too!  (grin)

The "Why" Questions

Joel and I were talking about our journey over the past 58 months and reflecting on our experiences. \ It has been nearly 5 years since Holy Spirit shook up our world, since our veer we took to the right with Joel's overnight miracle. A veer is a change in course or direction and we definitely have experienced that.  Joel told me that while in this season of revelation he has asked God, "Why did this come to us so late in life?"  Yes, why now Lord?

Speaker and teacher Graham Cooke has stated that why questions are never answered here on earth, that why questions are asked from a victim stance.   He considers them invalid.  They make us invalids.......and often victims of our circumstances.  Something to think about.  Joel has often said to me that we have no answers for the "whys", so maybe we we would be better off asking God, "What does this mean? What do we do now?"

Looking back we know we began this journey with Holy Spirit 44 years ago when we went with persistent friends to their church in Duluth Minnesota.  We would go to Sunday morning services at our Lutheran church and with friends Sunday night to their Assembly of God congregation, The Tabernacle.  I really enjoyed going there and felt right at home, while Joel found it a bit uncomfortable......not knowing what to expect. Joel told me recently that we kept going because I wanted to.  I did not know that, but I knew I had been searching for a deeper relationship with God.

At the Tabernacle I recall their vast auditorium with wooden seats and a full orchestra for worship.  It was amazing to sing along with the piano and orchestra.  I also hold close two special God experiences while we were there.  One was an encounter with Jesus or an angel.  I cannot tell you who, but I can tell you it happened.  As I went up front to kneel at the altar in prayer, I had my hands folded and eyes closed.  I felt someone cover my hands with their warm ones, then my hands were taken apart and lifted up in the air.  I remember smiling and opening my eyes to see who was cradling my hands, and was completely surprised to find I was all alone at the altar. There was no one in the natural world holding my hands, "only" that special Someone in the spirit world.  

At that time in my life I was struggling with some childhood issues.  I was experiencing anxiety when Joel left home for work, whether day or night.  I struggled with fear and a deep sadness that a therapist was able to pinpoint as a grieving over my father's death.  I was 7 when he died, and my sister and mom were so worried about how distraught I was that we pretended my dad was away on a trip.  We pretended he would be home soon.....that pretending kept me in a place of grief that was showing up in my daily life when my hubby left for his own "trip" to work each day.  Once we were able to connect the grief in my 20's with my loss at age 7, the doors to that healing opened.  God knew I was in need of His touch on my life and it came literally at the altar one Sunday night.   I was hungry for something more during that season of growth in 1972 and God provided that.

Going to The Tabernacle also opened a door that took me 40 years to walk through.  As I have said before, this church is where I first heard the gift of speaking in tongues.  Several women went into a prayer room and I went along with them.  I sat on a chair and watched them all get down on their knees and pray....first quietly in English and then in their prayer languages.  While sitting there listening, I felt such a deep sense of peace come over me ~ which I know now was the presence of God.  Leaving the church that night, I began a quest for myself and spent a few weeks trying to receive this gift before coming to the conclusion that it must not be for me.  I was unable to seek more understanding with our friends, because Joel was assigned to Clark Air Base, so we left Duluth and headed across the ocean to The Philippines.

While living in The Philippines I also became involved with an Interdenominational prayer group of women who's husbands were in the military.  We prayed, sang, and while there I experienced my first healing.  I had been dealing with boils and had a large one under my arm.  The first time they lanced the boil and stuffed it with gauze Joel could hear me yell from down the hall.  I had to go back and have it drained again and repacked and two women prayed for me before I left the group. While the Dr. worked I never felt a thing.  The nurse who was holding my arm tightly over my head kept asking me if I could feel what they were doing......they had expected some reactions to the intense pain that comes with such a procedure.  I said no.  They were confused, but I told them..."I was prayed for and God took away the pain".  He certainly did!

Even with two of my friends in the Philippines having the gift of tongues, and even with the women's group I was part of sharing Holy Spirit, and even with my healing experience,  I did not walk through the door into my own encounters with Holy Spirit for so many years.  How grateful I am for His patience!

It was 40 years later that I did receive the gift of a prayer language.  It was 40 years later that I encountered Holy Spirit.  I find irony in the 40 year marker........seems like that is an important number in Bible history.

It was while looking back at all this that Joel and I pondered if God was patient and persistent with us, or if it was His timing.  Maybe a little of both.  When the "why" questions rise to the surface we try to leave them at the feet of Jesus, so we are doing that in regards to our own long journey through the wilderness.  We are receiving all that God has for us now in our adventures with Papa, Jesus and Holy. Grateful, so grateful for where He has led us the last 44 years and where He is leading us now.

The River Reference

God has been highlighting Ezekiel 47 to Joel and me the past week.  In this chapter the prophet Ezekiel is shown by an angel the water flowing from God's Temple.  The angel first shows Ezekiel where it is coming from, and then he measures it..... first ankle deep, then knee deep, then chest deep, and then over his head.  On either side of this river 12 fruit trees are growing and they produce new fruit every month of the year because they are watered by the Temple river.  The leaves on these trees are used for medicine. It is a very interesting prophetic vision given to the prophet Ezekiel for Israel.

 God's references to a river first started on September 19th, a few days before our river flooded here in town. While meditating  I saw Joel by a river, fishing on the side of the bank.  He then put his pole down and took off his boots and socks, rolled up his pants and got into the river.  He waded around for a while and then immersed himself in the river.  While in the water Joel noticed a small waterfall where a fresh stream was flowing into the river.  He climbed out and started walking up the hill to find its source.  He came up to a huge boulder flecked with gold that was at least a 60 feet high. The water reflected off the dark colored rocks as it trickled down, forming a stream and then ending up in the river.  I then saw God's hands come out from the rock and He laid them on Joel's head.  As He did so I noticed that Joel's hair was dark black, like when he was young.  I heard "I have anointed you to preach the gospel, heal the sick, cast out demons, and raise the dead."  Joel then turned around and he could see his life from this starting place and as it went down to the river.  On either side he could see things that he had been protected from, and as his life journey progressed the path got wider and wider.  At the end the path split looking like arms raised in praise to God.  I then heard the prayer of Jabez..."Oh Lord, that you would bless me indeed.  Enlarge my territory.  Let your hand be with me, and keep me from harm so that I will be free from pain." (And God granted him his request.)   

What God showed me that morning led me to read Ezekiel 47 again.and then another devotional we read mentioned the river of God.  I remembered something similar in Heidi Baker's book, "Birthing the Miraculous" so Joel and I went back and read the chapter "Deeper Still", based on Ezekiel 47. We prayed that God would keep revealing to us what He wanted us to know about this river, because when we get the same message more than 2-3 times we know we are to pay attention.

Later that same day I went to Bethel Church's site and noticed that they were premiering the movie "Holy Spirit Reborn", so Joel and I decided to watch it.  I mentioned it in a previous post.  About half way through an evangelist from a South African villages spoke about how God came to him as a boy and led him to become a Christian.  He spent his time bringing Jesus and His healing power to the villages.  He talked about how Holy Spirit came into his life, sharing that Holy Spirit is like a flowing river.  He went on to that that when we are in a river we cannot control where it takes us, the current does that....and it is the same with Holy Spirit.  He takes us with Him and we are not in control, but we can trust Him with the journey.  He ended by saying "God is our Father and Creator, Jesus is our Savior, and Holy Spirit has been placed here in us and on earth now to empower and love us.   He wants us to surrender and let Him work through us in others."   Powerful.

So we know when we are just wading in a river ankle deep we can be in control of what is going on. When we are in knee deep we still have that control.  Waist deep as and it gets harder to go where we want to go.  Then when the water is up to our necks, we are not in control of where the river current takes us.  It is also the same with Holy Spirit.  When God asks us to surrender to Him and His plans for our lives, do we just wade in that, or do we immerse ourselves, trusting God to take us where He desires us to go.....trusting Holy Spirit as He blesses us.  Loving us, empowering us with that river of Living Water to be used by God for His plan and purpose.

I am sure God is not through teaching us about all the river references He has sent our way.  We keep asking for Him to reveal all He wants us to learn, difficult as it may be.

Pastor Seth Dahl says that Holy Spirit is never shown to be a depersonalized force.  He is God.  He wants an intimate relationship with us. He is not an "it".  He is Holy.  Part of the Trinity.  Not a wind.....but God's breath, living, powerful, and personal.  When Jesus left this earth he told the disciples that God was sending them someone to help them do even more than He had done.  Come Holy Spirit, come.

Showering Us With His Affection

What happens when God's way of communicating with us becomes new and somewhat mysterious?  I recall nearly three years ago when Holy Spirit made Himself known in a powerful way.  I had never experienced this kind of encounter and did not know anyone then who had, but during a time of worship in our home, He came like a heavy blanket over me.  It lasted for 4 months.   The first two weeks were intense and my body felt the Presence in such a physical manner that at times I needed Joel's support to walk.  Now, stay with me here, as I speak with honesty, because this is what I experienced.  This kind of physical and spiritual encounter continued at a lower level for over 3 more months, subsiding greatly by the end of the 4th month.  And then it was over.  It is hard to describe, but we definitely knew it was from God.  It put us on a quest to understand the experience more of course, and we have read about others with similar encounters since then.

 Saturday while watching the movie "Holy Spirit Reborn" a pastor asked this question..."Why is the church so afraid of Holy Spirit?"  With tears in his eyes he truly wondered why people are afraid to experience the Presence of God in ways where Holy Spirit is in control.  Well, I know I had little idea what I was doing when I asked God for "more" of His Presence.  I certainly was surprised when He gave me what I asked for and beyond!  I thought I had it all wrapped up tightly in a bow and I thought I knew how it would present itself.  Surprise!   BUT I would not have missed it for the world.  Not. for. the. world.  At the end of those 4 months I felt God's love for me in a way I never had before, I became good friends with Holy Spirit, and inner healing was a "side effect" of those wrap around, come on down, I desire all of you days.  I did not want it to end.

I have longed for that same season once again, but have not experienced it at that level.  I pondered why until I heard someone say that there are hundreds of ways to communicate with God and I realized I need to be open to how Jesus/Holy/God wants to communicate with me now in this new season of my life.

Through the scriptures we learn that Jesus wants a close relationship with us.  For each of us that will look differently, and we won't all experience His presence in the same way.  Still, He longs to talk with us and have us talk with Him the way friends do.  He walks with us through every minute of every day.  He is not found just inside the walls of a church, He is found in you, around you.

Abi Strumwell, a Bethel church teacher says, "A relationship with Jesus is not about rules......it is about having many different ways to bond with Him."  In nature, in music, in dance, in art, in laughter, in tears, in quietness, in loudness, in encounters that shake our world."

Holy Spirit is a gentleman and will not make Himself known in us unless we give Him permission, but He wants to draw us closer to our God and in doing so it will shake up our world.   Our God is without boundaries, limitless, and crazy about His children.  Yes.  He is crazy about us.  He wants to make Himself known in us and I believe He gave us a new Spirit to love and empower us as we welcome Him.  He wants to shower us with His affection in a variety of ways.

                           

I Refuse To Partner With It!

I fell this morning.  I was ready to go walking, and went out the back garage door to find Joel.  The step there is awkward and I fell off the step going down on my knees hard on the cement.  I did not stop there though, as gravity quickly took me down on my hands and arms into the rocks.  On the way down I started yelling "nooooooo" but was still stunned to find myself laying flat, or as flat as you can with my belly and top half.  I had to yell for Joel because I knew I could not get up by myself.  My core strength is weak, and it would have been a challenge with nothing to support me.

My first reaction was to cry.  Yep.  I'm a cryer.....and then I just got mad.  After the anger came a bit of fear for the "what ifs" and then along came poor me.....The poor me person likes to visit if I am not careful.

After a brief check to make sure no bones were broken, Joel got me into the house and on the sofa where we went over a check list.  No broken bones...no twisted ankles......Knees red and right one swelling...bruises quickly forming.   When I knew nothing was broken, I said to Joel.  "I refuse to partner with this!"  I am walking and he said he would go along.......just in case.  Well, I got only half a mile in, but I walked.  Came home and iced my knee and tried to ignore the arms and wrists aching and the pelvic bones that hold arthritis talking loudly.  After a rest, my upper left arm is complaining when I lift it above a certain level, a few muscle aches are settling in.   All from a little ol' fall.  It causes me to pause and take stock of this broken body....So much of it has healed, but it still has further to go.

It would be easy to get discouraged.  It has been a rough week, heck, it has been a rough year.  IF I focus on all the situations we have found ourselves in......but that is not where we are to put our focus.  Today I am refusing to partner with any of that anymore.

Refusing to partner......I first heard that from Bethel church in CA.  It is usually used to combat the spirit realm.  Before you feel creeped out, remember the scriptures that tell us specifically with warning that we are not fighting with people but with principalities in the spirit realm.  That nasty devil is real.  His co-horts are real. No details given here, but Joel and I have encountered enough of the dark side of the spirit realm to not take it lightly.  But there is another spirit realm.....the good guys!  Angels that watch over us......Jesus and His power that lives in us ~ saves and heals us........Holy and His comfort and "dunamis"power that empowers us....God and His love and wisdom.  Yeah those are the good guys.  The Word says Jesus never refused to heal anyone.  Jesus said to speak to your mountains just like He did.  He told us He never did anything the Father did not tell him to do.  Jesus said He would send us a comforter...a dynamite Spirit that empowers.

It helps me to speak it aloud, what I am rejecting.  Refusing to partner with a bad attitude, a spirit of fear, the ranting of politicians, the bad reports on TV.  I refuse to partner with sickness or disease.  I refuse.

So today I refuse to partner with all that has gone on, is going on, and keeps demanding attention in our world or my broken body.  I refuse to walk in fear or pity or anger.  I speak to it all, commanding with the authority given to me by Jesus.   I remember His Word and take it to heart.  I refuse to partner with it.

Come, Holy, Come!

It is Pentecost Sunday........a time to remember just what happened when Holy Spirit came down with tongues of fire on all the people gathered.  We read about it in the book of Acts.  In some churches people wear the color red to church, and often services focus on Holy Spirit.

Until four years ago I did not fully understand Holy and His importance in my life.  Now I cannot imagine going through a day without chatting with Him, calling upon Him, opening myself up to be filled and empowered by Him.  He is part of the Trinity, He is not an "it", He is our Comforter, the One who fills us with power.....the same power that raised Jesus from the dead.  Yeah, that power.

Recently we heard a great definition of being "baptized in the Holy Spirit".  As Christians we know that when we are baptized as children, Holy Spirit comes into us.  When we are baptized in the Holy Spirit, Holy is able to move through us and in others.  It is just a time of asking for Holy to empower us.  Often, but not always, the gift of a prayer language comes with this prayer.

Joel was given the gift of a prayer language when he was healed.  Several colleagues he knows had the same type of experience.  They did not ask for it, but it came to them during a time of prayer or of healing. Some people think it is not of God, this gift.  Fear and caution gets in the way of a different and deeper kind of relationship.  Not better, not more important, but just "something more" that is available to everyone.

Holy Spirit often manifests Himself with laughter, tears, a physical heaviness, or even falling in the Spirit. This has happened to both Joel and me.  Often there comes with this presence a sense of being loved and cared for.  A sense of deep peace.  Sometimes new insights from God.

We use the speaking in tongues to build up ourselves as the Bible states and we use it when we do not know how to pray for someone.  I sometimes sing in the Spirit.  There is an amazing amount of controversy that comes with this gift.  I am not sure why, but it can send people to question if it is real or not.  Only you and God can decide if what His Word speaks is truth and is for you.

We are grateful for God shaking up our world so dramatically just over 4 years ago. Grateful for all the gifts of the Spirit.  Grateful for His Word.  Grateful for Pentecost! Not just to celebrate one Sunday a year, but every day.  Come, Holy Spirit, Come.