Ain't No Battle, Ain't No Valley, Ain't No Grave

When I lay in the hospital that first night I was so discouraged that the surgery had failed.  It had been an ordeal with bad results that still knots up my stomach when I think about it.  Joel was sleeping in a recliner next to my bed, and I was quietly talking to God.  I asked Him what He, Jesus, and Holy had to tell me.  I immediately saw three separate segments of scenes.  Jesus was in the first one and I could see only a close up of His scared hand.  God said to me,  "Jesus, my Son, and man of God suffered."  Immediately I was looking at the throne of God.  God was sitting on the throne and asked me to come sit by Him.  I was a young child and climbed up next to Him.  I said, "We are not even to look at your face, so I don't think I should be sitting beside you on the throne."  God replied, "You are my child, my heir and you can sit right beside me!"  He had His arm around me holding me close.  Then I saw a long brick road with trees lining both sides.  They were barren, no leaves or fruit.  I saw a palomino horse slowly going down the road.  For reasons that are personal I expect, I sometimes see Holy Spirit as a Palomino.  Behind Holy Joel and I were on our hands and knees trying to move forward. At times the horse would look back at us.   I immediately thought, "This is the valley of the shadow of death."  I noticed we were slowing going through...opportune word....going through.  There was no real explanation given for what I was seeing that night.  I tucked it away and tried to sleep.

Then this week I was listening to the song "I Raise A Hallelujah" and saw the brick road again.  I saw Joel and I on our hands and knees behind the palomino horse.  I noticed the horse's tail actually was the word Hallelujah.  Then all around this valley the sky became a beautiful sun-gold color and as I looked I realized the sun gold was people.  People surrounding us, praying, singing, and smiling.  I am not sure what it all means yet but praise was in the atmosphere.

Joel has told me over and over that in the last three months he goes back to the prophetic word we were given at Bethel Church where a woman shared that she saw us going through a season "on our hands and knees".  I told her I did not want to go through any more struggles and she said, "There is grace in it."  She went on to say that this season would end.  We would stand back up and be blessed more than ever with a "new thing" that God has for us.  The man who also spoke over us told both Joel and I to hang on to our joy.  Our strength would come from the joy of the Lord.  Joel keeps holding tight to the words.........you will stand up again and there will be amazing new things ahead.

The brick road I saw in my visual encounter brought to mind the prophetic words we received.  Do we understand it?  No.  Do we embrace it?  Not really.  But somewhere in the midst of it all there are things we know.  God looks at us as His kids.  He loves us so much He sent His Son to suffer and die....AND raise again.  Going through the valley, any valley, we are not alone.  Even in death, and it will come for all of us some day, we have victory.  Victory is ours because of Jesus.  It is a done deal!

Spending so much time at the cancer infusion center, I have observed so many who are in a battle to live.  Who are hurting, weary, and yet hopeful.  This weekend at the ER infusion room I was in a chair next to a woman who was getting an IV antibiotic like me.  Her arms were covered in bruises where veins had failed.  She was obviously weary.  We saw her again yesterday at the cancer center, smiling and nodding at us in recognition as we walk a familiar journey.  I thought about how the enemy uses cancer for evil, to discourage and try to destroy God's beloved.  He is such a coward. Tears rolled down my face as I thought about the bravery and hope expressed in all those who fight to live.  I pray they all know that they have Jesus fighting for them!

There is a chorus of a song I have been listening to that says it all.  We do live with hope for healing, for a long full life filled with purpose.  Even while we fight battles, we do so from a place of victory! Walking through the valley we do so carrying a Hallelujah victory sign.  And when our time on earth is fulfilled, the ultimate victory is ours.   Jesus already paid the price for our healing and for our salvation.  Wherever you find yourself today, remember that victory is yours!