A Book, A Donkey, And His Voice

While reading blog posts a few weeks ago I came cross Galatians 5:26 in The Message translation.  It left an imprint on my heart, stepping right in with the truth of it and finding a place to rest within the beating. Even though, or because of the weariness I carried at the time, I was unable to put it aside, so we read all of Galatians 5 as part of our morning devotions, grateful as more of the Word's words squeezed into my heart and found room to stay.  Powerful. Impacting. God's 2000 year old writings bound in leather always say what we need to hear so well.

"Since this is the kind of life we have chosen, 

the life of the Spirit, 

let us make sure that we do not just hold it as an idea in our heads

 or a sentiment in our hearts,

 but work out its implications in every detail of our lives.  

That means we will not compare ourselves with each other

 as if one of us were better and another worse.  

We have far more interesting things to do with our lives. 

 Each of us is an original. " 

Galatians 5:26

Msge

Each of us is an original.  One of a kind. We have heard it before, a repetitive song, off key at best. We are all unique.  Can we grasp it, or do we put it aside while making endless effort to belong or fit in somewhere.  Falling short in our own eyes, wounding the soul.   Living as Spirit filled people we are not to compare ourselves with each other.  Here is what vibrates with truth ~ a truth that is shouted from the mountain tops if we only listen for it.  We have far more interesting things to do with our lives  Each of us is an original..  How much time do we spend in the cesspool of comparison, looking down on or feeling put down upon?  To compare is to despair.  How can we compare one unique creation by the Creator to another unique one?

We know from God's Word that our uniqueness is from Him.  So is our identity.  The who we are and the Whose we are.  They are linked together.  Have you heard the quote..."You are only as strong as your weakest link?"  Christ in us, us living in the Spirit is what makes our links so strong.  Each equipped with God's gifts for His purpose.

I wrote the paragraphs above a few weeks ago, but evidently God had more to say on this topic!  The past few days Joel and I have been reading aloud a Christmas gift from me to my hubby....a book titled "Flash" by author Rachel Ridge. Described as charming, funny and written about an animal~~ what was not to like!   It is a true story about how a stray donkey came into the lives of one family and changed them all, including the four legged stubborn one they named Flash. The donkey just showed up one dark night.  Scared, beat-up, hungry.  His mysterious past made him skittish and super stubborn, but over time their patience and love brought him back to life.  

Early in the book Rachel shared about how she felt she failed in all she tried to do as a mom, wife, artist.  She just never felt she was enough and as she compared herself to others, like the people they rented their home from.....she fell short.  When the landlords told her they had named the Ridge family donkey themselves ( a different name)......and were often found feeding and talking to him from their home on the acreage, Rachel's insecurities reached a high point.

 But God......

Then through Flash she began to see herself in God's eyes.  God whispered to her one morning as she was scolding herself, " I have called you by name and you are mine."  She searched for the scripture connected to these words and read them again in Isaiah 43.  Remembering that Flash was restored through the family's love, and seeing his true self emerge again after the identity crisis he had experienced, it brought her to an awareness of her own identity crisis.  With prayer and scriptures she came to understand deep within that her identity came from her Creator.  Instead of repeating in her mind the long list of negative things she believed about who she was, she started remembering who God said she was.  Her identity was as His beloved.  Her value came not from what she did but from who she was, Whose she is.  Precious in His eyes.  This knowledge changed everything.
All because a "quirky animal with big ears" needed a home.  She stated, "God can us anything at anytime in any way to speak to us".

Sometimes God repeats the re-sounding song....and sometimes we think it is off key, so He persists in Love.  He reminds us of our identity through a donkey or a book about a donkey.  God can and does use anything at anytime in any way to speak to us.  Yes He does.  And one of the most important things He wants us to know?  Who. we. are.  The scriptures tells us, "Don't hold an idea in your head or a sentiment in your heart" ~~that does not line up with what God says about us(my words).

Each of us is unique.....created by God with a variety of gifts individual to our calling.  There is only one of us.  Our uniqueness is connected by Christ in us, our identity rooted within when we choose to live a life in the Spirit as kids of the King.  We are urged to embrace our uniqueness and step into our full identity. Remember He has called you by name.  

Pathways Defined, Insights Revealed

Joel and I have been reading a book called Sacred Pathways by Gary Thomas.  It is an in depth look at defining our spiritual temperaments, which in turn helps us understand what feeds our souls in worship and in our relationship with God.  There are nine different temperaments Thomas presents to his readers and through studying and answering some basic questions you can see what defines you. It has been very helpful for us!

We have definitely learned more about ourselves and what we are drawn to in worship. We have a strong foundation of faith in the Lutheran Church.  Baptized, confirmed, married, all within it's doors. I graduated from a Lutheran Bible College where I met Joel.  My great grandparents gave the land for their Lutheran church.  Joel's did the same!  We raised our children in the Lutheran tradition, with Joel being an ordained pastor for the past 36 1/2 years.

Still, back in 1972 we would find ourselves at the Lutheran church on Sunday morning and an Assembly of God Tabernacle on Sunday night.  They were certainly different forms of worship, and I felt completely at home with both.  The Philippines found us worshiping in an Interdenominational Church on Clark Air Base and I was involved in a large group of women who gathered to pray for the needs of others, and for healing on a weekly basis.  We sang songs, sometimes chanting Psalms, we prayed and received prayers. We were a group of women who came from different parts of the US and who came from different denominations, but with two things in common.  We were military wives and we believed in Jesus. Women who loved the Lord.  I loved this group!  I still long for such a gathering of diverse Christians who just love on each other and welcome Holy Spirit to be in the midst of it all.  After Joel became a Lutheran minister, those diverse groups were behind us.  Over the years periodically I would find comfort in the familiar and yet struggle with it at the same time.  When I expressed what I was feeling it would sometimes hurt those whom I loved the most.  I did not know how to justify or appropriately share what I felt.  I did not know how to combine the two of me into one style of worship....the enthusiast with the traditionalist.

And then I was introduced to this book that identified temperaments like the traditionalist, enthusiast, sensate, and more. Our friends Mary Lou and Keith brought the book to our attention, we began reading it and it all started to make sense to me.  My spiritual temperament fits into a church that raises it's hands to the Heavens, sings loud praise music, and looks for the supernatural and Holy Spirit to show up and shake up the scheduled service .......or at the least. my heart.  It would be why my top spiritual temperament is as an "enthusiast".  There I was.  Right there in print.  A typical enthusiast.  This is what feeds my soul and awakens my heart in such ways that I could burst with love for my God.  God always works things out!

I began to find this form of worship online at Bethel Church when I was first on the road to healing. And last summer we found a church here in town that fed both our souls in worship and teaching.  As time went by though, we realized we did not quite belong as Lutheran charismatic prophetic Christians.  So easy to find, right?  So we have been going to mostly Lutheran services again, especially when Joel is filling in.  Great people, great churches, and solid traditional services.

So, this place in our journey found us three Sundays ago at our son Mark's church in Lakeville MN. Hosanna is a "once upon a time Lutheran" congregation of 20,000 members with their own coffee shop, book store, assisted living buildings, and more.  Mega.  As we worshiped with Mark and our grandson Noah, and Jada,  I immediately felt my soul fill up once again with God's presence.  I quietly wept with joy that I could be in a "sorta Lutheran, prays for healing, charismatic, hands raised in praise" Sunday worship.  It. nourished. my. soul.

And because of the book God placed in front of us through dear friends, I was able to understand that this is exactly how I meet with God best, not only in church, but in devotions and prayer.   I need not criticize other forms of worship or desire others to be "like me".   I also need not feel guilty because my Lutheran heritage has widened its boundaries and is nourished more by a different form of worship, as an enthusiast who loves to encounter Holy Spirit and the supernatural.  My soul gets fed through relationships, enthusiastic worship, supernatural encounters, and feeling what I experience with Holy Spirit.  There is definitely room for all forms of worship in God's world.  We are all Christians....having unity in our diversity.

I am still exploring how to blend it all together.  The most important thing may not be where we worship, for God, after all, called Joel to be a Lutheran pastor.  The most important thing may be to learn how I relate best to our Papa God and make sure I take those minutes or hours to nourish my soul as an enthusiast.  I find it so amazing that God in His infinite wisdom created us all unique not only in body, but in soul and spirit. He created each of us, so our spiritual temperaments are also from Him and for His purpose.  And he created us to stretch and grow from other temperaments as well.  I have seen that with Joel, who scored high as a person who relates to God and worships well in nature.  I was not into nature much when I met him, but certainly seek it out now.  It is not at the top of my temperament list, but it has its place in my life.

Certainly, as with all books, we discern and glean from what we read, deciding what applies for us as individuals.  It was fun and enlightening to see our spiritual temperaments defined, revealing deeper insights and some inner peace as to what nourishes our souls.   I love how God guides us along the path He has for our lives, making all things work together for good as He shapes us.  Isn't He amazing!

My True Identity

I will be heading to my 50 year class reunion before long.  Fifty years ago I was one of 500 in my class that graduated from high school and headed off into the world. Some went on to college, like me, and others went into the work force or the military draft board came calling.

I don't often think about my high school years, but I do enjoy staying in touch with friends.  High school was, well, high school with all that involved.  Classes, homework, and the social media of it's time.....connecting at our lockers, while walking to classes, and at games.  We talked on the phone a lot, which was connected to the wall in our house.  I always sat on the counter and chatted.  One phone for 7 people.  On the wall.  Shocking in today's world.  But I digress...........

Lately God has been speaking to me about my identity, and reunion stuff had me thinking about where I received my identity in my teenage years.  My family and my church were a solid part of my life, but I can't help but smile when I remember how great I felt in my saddle shoes, mohair sweater, and white pleated skirts. ( no pants allowed for girls at that time).  Even my saddle shoes helped identify who I was.  Or so I thought at the time.  I do remember wanting to fit in, desiring the right clothes, the support of friends, and for me a boyfriend that not only cared about me but (subconsciously) made me feel safe.  In the sixties there were only the after school intramural teams for girls, and such activities as cheerleading, and school "clubs" to join.  Seeking acceptance was so everything as I walked through what was called junior high and high school.

Recently, God has been guiding me to ask where I get my identity.  I confess there are still moments in time when I wonder if someone will like me, how will this aging overweight lady be viewed, or even if what I write will be understood and embraced.  I am tempted to identify myself by what I do or don't do, or maybe how I look.  Yikes.  I am tempted to identify myself by how others view me, so is there still a bit of that teenage girl inside of me looking for approval? Maybe in all of us?

Dr. Brian Simmons has a Facebook page on his Passion Translation of the Bible.  He often posts something he calls "I hear Him whisper" which are prophetic words from God.  Today's was "I hear Him Whisper:  I (God) am your identity."  Needless to say, he had my attention. God is not subtle when He wants to me "get" something.  He often overloads me with the message, and this time was no different.  Several books have been coming to my attention and even though the topic is not about just defining who we are,  I have been drawn to their words on "identity".  Lisa Bevere, in her book, "Lioness Arising", talks about how we are each created unique by God.  We cannot be anyone but ourselves in life.  Each of us created for a purpose, with Christ residing in us to give us all we need to accomplish that plan.  Lisa's latest book, "Without Rival" is  about how to embrace your identity and purpose in an age of confusion and comparison.  (To compare is to despair).  Kris Vallotton asks how we see ourselves ~as a prince/princess or a pauper in his book, "The Supernatural Ways of Royalty".  And let me not forget what God's Word says about His children.  Yeah, God is definitely at work here!

We do identify ourselves by wearing many hats in life.  For me, that of daughter, sister, friend, wife, mother, mother-in-law, grandmother, and writer.  They are all parts of the whole me, but deep inside, God is asking, do you see?  Do you really see that I am your true identity.  I live in you.  You are a new creation in Me.  Your body is my temple!  Your spirit filled with my Spirit. You are a daughter of the King! King Jesus!  You are not to please others, you are to please Me. You are not to fear others, you are to fear( be in awe) me.  I love you as if there was only you, my child.  My beloved.  You can rest in this truth of where we find our identity.

Many in life are seeking to belong, to be accepted, and they may change themselves to blend in, to fit it.  I am not talking about just kids here, I am talking about adults who "go along with the crowd" whether that crowd is found in a church pew or on a bar stool.  Oh how it must sadden our Papa God.  He created us to be unique and find our identity in Him alone.  He wants us to embrace who we are on our journey to be Christ like.

Kris Vallotton says, "We all act according to who we believe we are, so it is vital that we hear who the Lord says we are.  When we hear God's name for us, we can allow that name to define our identity. We need not ask the question, "Who am I".  God has already answered that!

Like all of you I am blessed to wear many hats, several listed above.  But I am even more blessed to know that I am a daughter of the King.   I can rest and be at peace in the knowledge of my true identity. We all can.

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