The Heavens Weep

I woke up today thinking about the mass shooting at a Wal-mart in El Paso TX yesterday where families were school shopping.  Another domestic terrorist went into a busy area filled with innocent men, women, and children, and began taking their lives with a powerful weapon.  The reason is still being investigated, but it is being called a hate crime.  Soon after waking, I read online that yet another mass shooting occurred in Dayton Ohio overnight.  And last Sunday it was a festival in Gilroy CA.  And before that?  And that?  According to what I read, there have been 22 mass shootings in 2019 so far.  It is overwhelming.

I am so weary of reading about the mass shootings. I am so weary of hearing the arguments, political or personal that do nothing to solve the problem we have in our country with violence and hate.  When God''s creations, His own children, are murdered in the name of hate, racism, anger, and more, the Heavens weep.  Jesus was clear on how we are to treat others.  His message has not changed since it was written in the most important book ever.  The Bible tells us clearly to love one another, forgive one another, care for one another.  Jesus told us the most important commandment of all was to LOVE one another.  And it begins at home.  It begins in our hearts.  It begins with what comes out of our mouth.  There is serious power in our words.

Our family is multi-racial.  We were blessed to adopt children who brought with them a variety of backgrounds.  Chinese, Filipino, Hispanic, African American, Northern Cheyenne.  Our grandchildren are a beautiful blend of these ethnicities along with Korean, Norwegian, Danish, French, Irish, English, and more.  We are so proud of our "rainbow family" as Joel's Aunt Ruth used to call us.  And members of our family have been told "go back to where you came from" in one way or another, have been called derogatory names, been bullied, and mistreated by children and adults alike.  It saddens me greatly.  And the power of those words spoken hurts our family.  And it should hurt you, too.  And the violence and death of so many in our country?  It hurts you too.  What is said and done to others affects us all.

It sickens me when I read and listen to Christians speak hate, prejudice, and bias over others who do not look like them, live like them, believe like them, agree with them.  I don't see that there is just one answer to America's problems with violence and hate.  I certainly don't hold the answers, but I do believe that if each of us not only believe in Jesus but follow Him and truly become more "Christ-like" as the Bible says,  we will be led to live out God's commandment to love one another.

We are called the greatest country in the world for many reasons, one of which is our diversity.  I don't want "the greatest country in the world" to become the worst place to live due to the violence and hate that is spewed out over the country, the cities, our communities, us.  On days like this I turn to Jesus, and I can only ask for mercy on our country, on the loved ones of those who died.  On all of us. 

Today let's bend our knees in prayer.  God be with us all.

Unique And Quirky

I have been reading a Jan Karon book in her Father Tim series titled, "Shepherd'z Abiding". Jan Karon's Mitford series are such a delight to read.  Good, clean, faith based fiction books that give pause and bring joy.  You can even buy a book of "Father Tim quotes", there are so many treasures to hold on to.  Over 20 years ago Jan Karon spoke at Luther Seminary in St. Paul MN and Joel and I drove up to listen to her speak and to have the few books we had by her back then, autographed.  It was a great experience.

It has been quite awhile since I picked up one of her books, but I have been thoroughly enjoying it.  Father Tim and his wife Cynthia are now retired in the small town of Mitford North Carolina where he served as an Episcopalian priest to his unique and sometimes quirky congregation.

I cannot help but look back at the many churches Joel served over the years, each one unique with a few quirky members at times.  And are we not all unique and quirky in our own ways?  Each congregation with its own personality and purpose.  Oh what great memories we have for every place we called home, for every congregation that welcomed us.

And such adventures as we traveled in northern Montana where hawks, eagles, and antelope outnumbered the people.  And in Eastern Montana where Joel was able to baptize a 75 year old man and celebrate the eternal life that awaited him.  We still chuckle over one council meeting where it was put in the notes that the new pastor was wearing "inappropriate footwear" (square toed boots).  Joel was in need of new boots, so at the next council meeting he took off his new pointed toe boot put it on the table, asking the secretary to note that the new pastor now had appropriate footwear!  We ran into some very quirky people, and it was not always fun.......but the joy we experienced in the churches we served far outnumbered any negative experiences.

I love how Father Tim sees the good in all people.  How he quietly stands firm in what he believes without judging others.  For are we not all broken people, unique people, and even at times quirky?  God created each one of us as a masterpiece of His own making.  Our uniqueness is planned and used for God's purposes.  We can embrace who we are and trust God to guide us on our journey.

Do you have a congregation you sit among on Sunday mornings?  Do you observe the unique or quirky in the pews.........are you one of them?  Having served 7 churches and filled in or worked at 24 more over the years, we cannot help but smile at all the memories we have of those congregations that welcomed us.  Unique and sometimes even quirky as the members were......and us amongst them!

If you are looking for a good read.........a series that touches the soul, pick up a Jan Karon book.  You won't be disappointed, and it may give you a new perspective of your own home church!

A Firestorm

Whiskeytown Lake

last fall

A few days ago I noticed on my Facebook feed that there was a forest fire near Redding California.  Redding is surrounded by mountains and sits in a desert valley in the northern part of the state.  It is the home of Bethel Church, a large charismatic prophetic church that in well known across the world.  Joel and I went there last fall for 10 days.  We spent 40 hours at the church engaging in a variety of worship and teaching activities.  I left a piece of my heart back in that church community.  We also got to know the city of 95,000 quite well enjoying some of their beautiful places like Whiskeytown  Lake and Mt. Shasta. 

Whiskeytown Lake

We learned very quickly that Whiskeytown and the surrounding Lake area had burned.  Overnight a fire that had consumed 6,000 acres was fueled by winds to consume 20,000 acres.  Just three days later 38,000 of the residents have had mandatory evacuations, with about half of the city escaping south on Interstate 5.  Everything in the city is covered in ash and smoke hides the sun.  As of Sunday morning, the fire now has consumed 89,000 acres and is only 5% contained. 

I am very aware that this is only one of many fires that are out of control in the West.  This one touches my heart in a special way.  I cannot imagine the trauma involved with some of the stories I have heard on Instagram or Facebook live.  The fire has created it's own weather pattern and some poeple only have a few minutes to get out of their homes before it came with a roar, a fire tornado,  and fierce attack, burning everything in it's path.  A firestorm.

Bethel Church is still in tact, and since the fire turned a different direction, it was able to hold worship services this morning.  We watched live on Facebook, their media center was blocked and in an evacuation zone so Bethel TV was not up and running.  They are putting their resources in with the shelters and Salvation Army, and are planning to help all individual church members who have lost their homes.  Today they worshiped and prayed with people.  Worship is a weapon of warfare and certainly this destructive fire is not from God.  It is the enemy that comes to steal, kill, and destroy.  Not God.  God comes to give us abundant life.  And prayer?  It is a powerful tool and wonderful way to connect with God. 

A firestorm.  Ever feel like you have one of those in your own life, made up of sickness or disease, financial difficulties, or loss, to name a few.  It can come like a firestorm, burning up everything in its path, Our problems can seem bigger than our God.  The only place to turn is to Jesus.  Jesus, our Savior, our Provider, our Healer, our Everything.  Sometimes all we can do is speak His name, remembering that there is power in His name.  Everything can look bleak, hopeless.  But Jesus.  Our circumstances overwhelm......but Jesus. 

Jesus has the answers for us in His Word.  His promises.  God never goes back on His promises.    We can find a promise for every circumstance.  Like the one Sean Bohls prophesied over Bethel and the city of Redding based on Romans 8:28  "All things work together for good for those who love the Lrod." 

Things look desolate in the Redding community, and the fire rages on.  Losing your home, your possessions, your sense of comfort and safety has to be extremely traumatic.  In the midst of the suffering is where Jesus comforts and sustains.   No matter what firestorm comes our way, we are never without our God.

The Shofar's Message

For the past few months Holy Spirit has been guiding me concerning spiritual warfare.  It began in April during a time when we asked Jesus what kind of armor He wanted to give us.  For myself I immediately saw an angel pick up a shofar (a ram's horn) and hand it to me.  I was confused on what it meant but when I looked up information on the shofar, I discovered it was used to battle in the spirit realm, to confuse the enemy, and also for worship and praise.  Our question and God's answer put me on a path that continues today.

In May as I meditated I saw before me a huge angel possibly 9ft. tall.  He looked fierce, wearing a type of armor.  He had what looked like to be 4 wings.  I heard him pull a sword from the sheath at his waist.  Then I heard Jesus say, "You need to take this seriously."  I asked Him, "Take what seriously"?  I then heard the word, "warfare".  I replied, "I'm so weary of warfare."  I immediately saw hundreds of angels~ some on foot and some on horseback.  They were behind the 9 ft. angel. I felt the need to ask "What do I need to do?"  I heard the word, "DECLARE".  Immediately I heard the shofar and then saw one in my hand.  I saw myself lift it up high and turned to face the opposing army. They were on horseback and foot, wearing dark gray slate armor with their faces covered.   Each step we took forward caused the enemy's army to take a step back.

Then in early June I asked God to let us see in the spirit realm and immediately I saw the 9 ft. angel again.  He had 6 wings that were spread out.  He had a chiseled and very serious face, piercing eyes, although I don't remember the color.  He also had reddish blond hair.  There was a radiant light streaming behind him.  I heard, "I am here for you.  I am assigned to you.  I am fighting for you. I am with you always."  I said again, "I am weary of fighting" and he replied, "This is a war."  I then noticed I was wearing shoes of "peace" that I have seen in past visions, and Joel was standing beside me.  I saw a trumpet being blown and I heard it, but it sounded like a shofar.   I asked, "What do you want us to do?" and God laughed.  He said, "Don't ask questions, just focus on this."  We each were given a trumpet, handed to us the way surgical instruments are given to surgeons...precise and firm.  We then walked ahead with the trumpets,  blowing them.  We heard shofar sounds and then took a step.  Then again the shofar sound and took another step.  We were told again, "Declare.  Declare the works of the Lord."

In 2 Chronicles Jehoshaphat was told to send his worshipers and singers out ahead of the soldiers who were going to be fighting a number of armies.  He was obedient and his worshipers and singers went out ahead of the army.  As they did so, the opposing armies turned on each other and all died.  Worship and praise can be a weapon of warfare.  I'm thinking, so can declarations and praise for God's goodness in our lives.

Just this week I was re-reading what I had written about these visual experiences and I felt strongly that God wanted me to share these with the public again as a prophetic word for others, not just ourselves.  I have prayed and asked about it as I usually only "get" what I see for us, but He seems to want His people who are "weary of warfare" to know that He is with you always.  He is here for you.  His angels are assigned to you.  Encamped around you.   And what is warfare?  Sickness, disease, anxiety, financial difficulties, anything that seems like an uphill battle. He is fighting with you and for you.  . Victory will be yours.  Declare His goodness.  Declare all the times He has healed you.  Declare and give thanks for His promises, especially the ones He has spoken over your life.  Yes, worship and praise, declaring the goodness of the Lord.

Words Matter

"Every day I must remind myself
of how much words matter."

Christie Purifoy

I don't recall when I first heard about Christie Purifoy's book, "Roots and Sky", but I fell in love with her writing style and her story, somewhere in the first chapter.  Something in the way she puts words to paper brings a sense of peace to my soul. 

She has the ability to use words to create visual scenes of great detail for the reader's mind. Along with the visual extravaganza playing out, heartfelt thoughts carefully placed touch the soul.  Her words matter.  Our words matter.

On the day Christie Purifoy's  book was released, her brother-in-law was killed in a military heliocoptor that went down in the ocean near Hawaii.  Such joy mixed with such sorrow.  I remember her writing about the shock and pain for her sister and children, and how important the words were that soothed souls and strengthened lives to keep moving forward.  Words matter.

Words matter to not only each of us, but to God.  The scriptures certainly attest to that.  They are not to be taken lightly or tossed around with abandon.  His Word matters.  They are living, breathing, power-full.

Our words to Him matter.  That would be we give praise and honor who He is.  To God be the glory is not merely platitude but instruction and a form of worship that resonates from deep within.  We are the only living creatures on earth that can use words to communicate, encourage, build up (or tear down).  We use words to worship and give thanks to the One who used His words to create.

"Let the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart 

be pleasing to you, O Lord, my Rock and my Redeemer."

Psalm 19:14

As we celebrate Thanksgiving let us use our words to give thanks.   I am so grateful for the man who walks by my side, shares my bed, laughs at my antics, weeps in my sadness, and boldly lives out his faith. I am so thankful for our families who love the Lord and serve Him, who turn to prayer in any crisis.  People who don't forget to praise God for His goodness.  I am so thankful for extended families who walk in faith.  For great grandparents who gave land and built churches and worked hard to provide.  For the legacy that we now try to breathe into future generations.  I am so thankful for Papa God's deep love, His desire for us to know more, seek more.  I am so thankful for Holy opening a new door for us.  For Jesus giving His all for us.  For God and His goodness and faithfulness.  I am so thankful.

Words matter.

One Teacher's Words Shaped A Life

This past week Joel and I listened to a sermon Paul Manwaring spoke at Bethel Church about our past, present, and our future.  It was especially encouraging for us as he talked about the prophetic words that are spoken over us and what that means for our future.  Doubt likes to come in and steal what God has planted in your heart, but there is no room for doubt when we realize Jesus has already seen our future and He is speaking into that future.   He has already been there!  He knows the ending of our movie!!

Prophetic words/words of knowledge from God are used to encourage and build up, confirming the present and speaking the future in us and in others.  Bethel Church in Redding CA has a school for Kindg. through 8th grade.  Part of their school policy is to keep a folder on each child that is filled with encouraging words that have been spoken over the boys and girls that attend school and Sunday School there.  By the time they are through high school they have in their hands all the beautiful words of knowledge from God that have been given to their teachers to write down.  Amazing.

Paul Manwaring reminded us to also be aware of how we speak over ourselves.  Words matter.  I am completely convinced that God created the "words matter" idea!  His word is living...healing...powerful...saving........and so. much. more.  We need to be aware of how we speak over others too.  Our words hold power.

One great example of that is with the teacher Joel had for the first 8 years of his life.  He went to a one room school house and had the same teacher the whole time.  Joel had a difficult time reading.  He had some form of undiagnosed dyslexia or learning disability.  His teacher would encourage him all the time, supporting him, working with him, and telling him he could grow up to be anything he wanted to be!  No limitations.  He believed her and grew from a young boy who could only read with great difficulty to a man with 12 years of college behind him and a calling that requires a whole lot of reading and writing!

We need to take the negative words we hear, weigh and discern them, asking ourselves, "What would Jesus be saying?"   What are we to speak into others lives.....what are we to speak over ourselves?  This is NOT just positive thinking.  This is taking the Word of God and speaking it into your lives and the lives of others.  This is believing the Word is living, the Word heals, the Word saves.  This is believing our words do matter, that they do shape others. They shape lives. 

WOWs

The dream was strange, to say the least.........but the message that came to me in the early morning hour was clear.  In the dream I was trying to find our grandson Noah.  I had been searching and searching to no avail.  Worry and fear set in,  and I decided to call a friend of his named Sosh.  I know, an usual name....The young man answered his phone with one word, "Sosh", and I told him I was Noah's grandmother and I was looking for him.  I lamented about what I had done while looking for him and how worried I was.

As I spoke, I noticed a cloud to my right and with every negative or fearful thing I said, a -$25 sign popped up.  Sosh was quiet but when spoke, all he said was "Wow" and again, "Wow".  With every "WOW" he said, a cloud appeared and a + $50 sign popped up.

Awakened by the dream, I lay in the dark and I thought about the meaning.  My dreams are unusual and sometimes disturbing, but this one held a message for me.  One I have been learning for a few years now.

It is the whole business of our thought life and what we say ~ We speak life or death with our tongue.......Proverbs 18:21.  Our words and our thoughts hold tremendous power over our lives and the lives of others.  Just ask any adult who suffered from childhood verbal abuse.  Words matter.  I believe the dream was telling me that when I speak fear or any other negative words, it takes away from the goodness God desires for His kids.  And when I speak  God's truth with awe and wonder...the "WOWs" of life and God, we are all more empowered.

The "WOW" word took me back to what had been spoken over us at Bethel......the words so powerful and personal that all Joel and I could say was...."wow"......"Oh, wow".......   Sometimes when we look at God's deep love and goodness for us, all we can do is be humbled and amazed....words just won't come except maybe just a "WOW". 

Are there times in your life when the "WOW" brings you to your knees in thankfulness?  Just this year I think of many, like my sister's recovery from a heart attack and 6 bypasses.  So many small but important things fell into place for her to live and not die.   Wow.  I think about our trip out west....so often we were amazed by the beauty set before us.  Joel told me I said wow often when we drove through the majestic mountains.   While sitting under the people and Presence at Bethel Church, we gave thanks repeatedly. Wow.  Wow again.  The things God shows me in the spirit realm....wow.  Even our new-to-us SUV that Joel has often said "Wow" about.  So grateful to drive such a nice vehicle.  Yeah.....the list of "WOWs" is long and appreciated.

The dream brought to light a gentle reminder to keep my thoughts and my words in the life column. Building a firm foundation on the goodness of God in our lives one "WOW" at a time.  It adds up.  Maybe not in dollars like I saw in the dream, but in living a full life~ definitely!

Making My Pen A Weapon

It is not my intention to dwell on Satan and his followers, but at the same time we need to be prepared for what he sends our way.  Certainly the scriptures don't brush aside his desire to kill steal and destroy us. (John 10:10).  God in all His wisdom has provided us weapons of warfare for the spirit realm such as found in Ephesians chapter six. We can also add to the helmet of salvation, breastplate of righteousness, sword of the spirit, shoes of peace, shield of faith and belt of truth those of praise and prayer.  A wonderful book explaining the weapons found in Ephesians is "Dressed To Kill" by Rick Renner.

Yesterday I read an article that opened my eyes to yet another weapon of warfare we can add to our arsenal. That weapon is a pen.  Or in today's world a keyboard!  It never dawned on me that by writing what Holy Spirit leads us to write, we are actually fighting against the enemy's strategy.  Like I mentioned before, his  purpose is to kill, steal, and destroy.  Period and exclamation point.  God's purpose is to bring his children Home.  As writers, our purpose is to let others experience God through our words, between the pages of a book or across the Internet world.  Words as weapons of warfare against the enemy's deceptions..

"Putting pen to paper lights more fires than ashes could ever do."

We already know that God's Word is living and "sharper than any two edged sword".  We know that His scriptures "brings life to those who find them and healing to their whole body".  That God "sent His word and healed others".  Words are powerful.  In any shape or form, to build up or tear down, words hold power.  If we have the gift of writing, whether it be books, blogs, songs, or poetry, when we use that gift for God's glory, that in itself fights against Satan's plans for evil.

Today I am addressing pens as weapons, but I believe any gift we have, when used for God's purpose, is a weapon.  Like to paint?  Enjoy singing?  Love to teach?  Each time we step out in faith to use our gifts, I believe Heaven rejoices and hell trembles!  Not all weapons of warfare put us in a battle stance, but they do bring Heaven to earth and joy to our Lord.  What is your weapon?

What A Beautiful Name It Is

Sunday Pastor Bill Johnson shared a personal story about his son Brian during his sermon.  When Brian was around 10 he would consistently have night terrors.  He would often climb into bed with his parents and Bill would speak over him, pray for him, comfort him.  He told Brian there were 4 ways to fight the spiritual warfare coming against him in the middle of the night.  1. Fight back with the name of Jesus. 2. Fight back with the blood of Jesus.  3. Speak God's Word over the circumstance.  4. Praise God.  (the enemy hates praise).  One night Brian did not come into their room and the next day Bill asked his son if he slept well without any night terrors.  Brian said no, but he had asked God for a verse to speak over the terrors and God gave Him one.  Brian learned to use those tools for himself and the night terrors were resolved.

Jesus ~~Savior.  Healer. Friend.  Protector. Son.  The Way * the Truth * the Life. What a beautiful name it is!   I have spoken the name of Jesus as a prayer on those occasions that I cannot sleep at night....when anxiety or a wired mind has me tossing.  I breathe in Jesus and I breath out stress.....when I breathe in I say "JESUS"  when I breathe out I exhale anxiety.  95% of the time I fall asleep.  Speaking the blood of Jesus for protection comforts me.  And I know His Word is mighty to proclaim.  Praise.....well it not only causes the enemy to run, but it fills me with joy and connects me to God.  Now if I could just remember to use these tools all the time!

I remember a story that was told about a mom who was having stomach pain.  It was pretty bad and as she lay on the sofa, her little 3 year old son came over to her, laid his hand on her tummy and said. Mommy's owies, Jesus.  Gone.  I can't help but smile when I write this.....of course her pain left.  Her child had believed, prayed with child like faith, and his mommy was healed.  Bless his little heart!

Quite a while ago my friend called me while she was traveling through crowded Phoenix.  One of her children noticed her sister was not responding well, a sign of seizures coming.  We prayed together while on the phone.  Later she called me and shared that she had felt they were to sing praises.  So they all began to praise God and sing songs of praise over her little one. Quickly she was was back to being alert and the potential for a seizure was gone.  Praise is a weapon of warfare and believe me when I say, sickness and disease is a weapon the enemy brings against us.  God provides weapons, powerful weapons for us to use against him and here is an example of praise as one of those weapons. The victory in Jesus is always ours!

One morning recently I woke from a bad dream.....it had been going on for several hours so I started to think about what it meant.  I whispered, "The circumstances need to change, Lord.  Healing is provided."  A voice, His voice spoke back to me as I drifted off......"my child, pay attention to what I say...."

"My child, pay attention to what I say,  

listen carefully to my Words.  

Don't lose sight of them.

Let them penetrate deep into your heart 

 For they are life to those who find them 

and healing to their whole body."

Proverbs 4: 20-23

The Word is LIVING. POWERFUL. So is the name of JESUS.  The Bible tells us we speak life or death with our words...........Jesus tells us , "I have come to give you life and to give it to you more abundantly".

Yesterday I wrote about the weapons of warfare God provides.  Today it is still on my mind.   Are you in need of a few weapons of warfare?  Life throwing challenges your way?  Fear taking up residence?  Discouragement heavy like a yoke on your shoulders?

Turn to the weapons provided.....His WORD, His name, JESUS, His BLOOD, the action of PRAISE!  Add these to your arsenal along with Ephesians 6.....and victory is yours.

 "Mommy.  Owie.  Jesus.  Gone.

Be A Voice, Not An Echo

Somewhere in the depths of my captive memories I held tight to the lie that my voice held no power.  I expect it started in early childhood, but knowing the root cause may remain a mystery and is really not important.  What I do know is that it took up residence and I spent too much of my life echoing the thoughts of others, believing my voice held no power.

A great example of this was displayed early in our marriage.  During the first ten years,  I would always start opinions or responses with..."Joel says..........."  If Joel said something, that was the way it was. He did not demand that at all, I just believed his words held more weight than mine.  Then Joel's cousin Luther helped me understand what I was doing.  While he was getting his doctorate in the Twin Cities he used to come and spend a great deal of time with me and the family. Joel was working long hours at a hospital, attending classes, and studying hard at night, so he did not have much free time.  Luther saw this pattern I had of quoting Joel.  He began to say to me, "I don't want to know what Joel thinks, I want to know what YOU think!"  Things began to change inside, and honestly, it took some adjusting for both Joel and myself.  After 10 years of marriage I began to voice my own thoughts and give them value.

Even though I have been writing for others for the past 16 years, finding my voice and believing in it has continued to be a slow journey.  This growth process really excelled into the fast lane when I started Sozo Ministry for inner healing the end of 2012.  In fact, Sozo has played a pivotal roll in my healing story.  During my first visit, before I had ever met the women in charge of my session, they had prayed about me and had some things to tell me.  The first thing they shared was that Holy Spirit had told them to tell me~~ "You. have. a. voice."  They told me that God listens to my voice, He wants to hear what I have to say, and that He wants me to use my voice.  They went on to share a couple of Bible verses, the same ones God had been highlighting to me all week.   I was stunned by their words, but quickly realized that God was at work here.  Part of the inner healing that took place was finding my voice.  I am so grateful that God has asked me to use my written words to speak about Him.  Grateful I am to be a voice for God and not an echo for someone else. We all are called to be a voice.

The original quote, "Be a voice, not an echo",  is by Albert Einstein.  Kris Vallotton expanded on it in his book, "Heavy Rain", with words I wanted to share here.

"I have been called to be a voice, not an echo."  
"I refuse to be reduced to a political affiliation, a denomination, a generation, 
a geographic location, my sexual orientation or my ordination.  
I will not settle for becoming a cheap imitation of another 
instead of an original of myself.  ......" 
"On the other hand, it is not my desire to become a maverick 
who exchanges the solid foundation of time-tested truth
 for the test tube of isolation.  

Therefore I will allow the Holy Spirit 
to lead me, guide me, and correct me.....
......to be a voice and not an echo"

Recently I watched Diane Sawyer's interview with Jaycee Duger on ABC.  Diane asked Jaycee's counselor if she thought she should tell her it was time to move on and stop talking about what happened to her.  (She has written a second book about her long horrific ordeal. ) The counselor made a profound statement. She told Diane that Jaycee had been held captive with no freedom to make her own choices for 18 years.  She would not begin to tell her what to do.  Jaycee would know when it was time to move on.  Jaycee's voice had been taken away, all her freedom had be taken away for so long, and it was important that no one tell her what to do or say now that she was free.  It was important that she be heard.  She now had a voice.

Finding our voice is a true gift.  We are all unique and so are our lives, so is our journey.  We are all called to be a voice, not an echo.  Along the way it is easy to settle, to keep silent, to be an echo, but God has created us to rise up and be His voice.  His voice crying out in the wilderness....His voice proclaiming the gospel...........His voice speaking love and truth.  His voice. Our voice.  We are to be a voice, not an echo!

They Didn't Make It?

Yesterday Joel and I watched, via the internet, the funeral service of Officer Susan Farrell held at a church we have attended with our son and his family in the southern part of our state.  It was packed with officers from Iowa, surrounding states, and a few around the country and from Canada.  Officers honoring one of their sisters in blue. (Her partner who died in the crash will be laid to rest on Friday.)

The chief of police, Dana Wingert, gave a powerful and moving speech.  He began with these words....
"They didn't make it."  The words spoken  to him when he was informed of the horrific crash that killed  two of his officers.  He went on in his talk to speak about officer Farrell and her calling, and addressed her husband, a fellow officer, and the family.   At the end of his talk he brought it back to the words he first spoke...."They didn't make it."  And then he said, "I stand here before you to argue that statement because they did make it and now they reside in God's house.  And they will watch over us the rest of our days.  Blessed are the peacemakers, for they will be called children of God."

Later one of Susan and her husband Jesse's friends spoke.  He is a friend, pastor, and police officer who was asked to talk about Susan,  and he also spoke to her husband and little daughter, the love they shared, and how God will continue to be with them.  I loved hearing these respected men in blue speak about our Lord, reading scriptures, praying, declaring faith.  Thank you Jesus.

"They didn't make it?"  No, they did make it......they made it to a life eternal and now reside in Heaven with our Jesus.....

Life is unpredictable at best.  Life is what happens while we are making other plans.  The man who hit them head on while going the wrong direction on the Interstate, was drunk and driving at an estimated 100 mph......  Yes, life is unpredictable, so it is very very important to be right with God....to not put off what God is asking of us......We think we have all the tomorrows before us so we often put off those things we know that we know that we know.  Maybe we need to commit to studying God's Word....to praying more......getting to church........speaking to that someone we have been angry at.  Seek to heal that relationship......lose that weight.......love that neighbor........forgive that person......spend time listening to our Lord.  Say yes to our Papa God at any cost.

God is always waiting to hear from us.  He never turns us away, but waits patiently for us to live the life he has planned for us.   Sometimes life gets in the way of that plan.  Sometimes death.  Bad choices result in bad consequences.  This 25 year old young man made a bad decision that ended innocent lives and his own, and changed the lives of so many others.  Lord have mercy.  Let us not put off listening to God's voice beckoning us to a life filled with His presence here on earth and in Heaven.

Pristine and Perfect!

I went to the doctor yesterday morning and after a pressure and vision check and a good look into my eyes the doctor gave us good news..."The implants look pristine.  With your history of Lyme Disease and other things, doing anything to your eyes is like walking a tightrope, because we have no idea how the body will respond.......so I am very happy to say your surgery went great, there is no sight of inflammation or proteins coming against the implants.  All looks perfect!"  Perfect and pristine.  We practically danced out of the office.  Yes!  Another hurdle passed.

The affect of his words on Joel and me got me thinking.  It is amazing how a few words spoken to or over us have the power to change our lives.  At Bible study today we discussed the power of words and how important it is to declare God's truth over us, no matter our circumstances.

I confess there have been times when life feels overwhelming, during which I head for what I call a "melt down", speaking negative and hopeless words.  Often Joel is within hearing distance.  One time when I was doing Satan's work for him by speaking negatively over my situation, Joel got up and walked out of the room and out of the house.  It certainly startled me, which was his intention.  When he came back he said, "You may choose to speak destructively but I refuse to listen or be a part of it."

Powerful.

Psalm 18:21 tells us we speak life or death with our words.  And we have a choice!  We also have a choice of whether we will listen to someone else speak death, like Joel when he made the choice to walk away from my words of self pity and destruction.  Yes, there is life or death in our words.

Certainly there are times when we do not hear what we want to hear,  but hopefully we seek God's truth for us during those situations......because it is there to be found in His Word.  We don't deny the diagnosis, painful situation, or loss. but we turn to God and His promises to see us through the valley or the storm.

I don't expect to hear the words pristine or perfect often, but maybe I should?!?  What I can expect to hear is "life" as it comes with intention from my mouth, the mouths of others, and the Word.   Life.  Joy.  Hope. Power. Truth.  It is a good way to live, because there is power in our words.  And in His.

Living Up Or Down

"Most people will rise up to how you treat them,

and what you say to them or over them.'
Candace Johnson

Bethel Church

There it is again....word power. 

If we criticize and put down others......if we speak negative things over them.....if we talk badly about others whether they are around to hear or not?  We are speaking against what God tells us in scripture. 

Children will live up to or down to what we speak over them.  They are shaped by our words.  They are shaped by our actions.  They are shaped when our words don't match our actions and when they do.   God holds children in high regard, and so should we. 

As adults we are affected by what others say about us and over us, but we need not be.  We can release their words and embrace God's.  In God's eyes we are enough.  We are His beloved.  We are sons and daughters of the King.  God delights in us and rejoices over us in singing. He loves us with a perfect lovc. 

Those words have power in our lives.  They give us courage to live up to them.  Let our words do the same.  Word power.

Word Power

We are still sorting and purging.  This week we pulled tubs out of the storage area and started going through papers from the office and years of life for Joel, me, and each of the kids.  We also found another big box of cards!  In explanation, we have so much stuff, because for so many years I did not have the physical energy or cognitive clarity to go through it all.  We just dumped things in tubs and moved it with us.  Yes, I do have a love affair going with paper and the written word, but now that I have the fortitude.....things, they are a changing! 

Cards, I confess, are my weakness.  I love cards, always have and I love these cards because of the words from the heart that have been shared by our kids and each other.  So here I was with yet another box to sort through.  I knew it was time to let them go.  Seriously.  Let them go.

It took me two hours to read each card and decide what to keep and what to throw.  I ended up keeping a small pile and tossing two brown grocery bags full.  It was painful at first, but then it got easier and easier.  So, the box Joel said to just keep because it was impossible to choose?  I am going to go through that one next.  With courage I will read each one, give thanks and then toss it.  Sigh.  My goal it to have one small box left from 47 years worth of cards. 

What makes them so special is what is written in the childish scribble, the teenage scrawl, or adult penmanship.  Those words of love from their hearts that fill ours. 

Words are so important.  They hold so much power. Whether we speak, read, or write them, they have power in our lives.  They can define who we are.  They encourage, discourage, destroy, or build up.  Words. have. power. 

I was listening to someone speak about the words we read in the Bible.  He asked us to consider what we feel, see, experience, or understand when we read the word Holy.  Just Holy.  Then think about the word Jesus.  Oh, what comes to mind when we say the precious name of Jesus.  Those two words, and so many other words in the Bible hold such deep meaning. 

The Bible tells us that the Word has great power in our lives. . The Word is living, more powerful than a two edge sword.  It has Living Waters power.   Saving power.  Healing power.  Comforting power.  Armor of God protection power.  Yes!

Whether words of love on a card, or words of love from the One who loves with a perfect love....there is power in the word!  Wear it like armor, treasure it like gold, defend yourself with it like a sword.  Receive and release it as living and powerful. 

"My child, pay attention to what I say.

Listen carefully to my Words

Don't lose sight of them

For they bring life to those who find them

And healing to their whole body."

Proverbs 4:20-22

The Atmosphere, Captain Phillips, And Our Words

Ann, over at A Holy Experience, wrote today about the benefits of giving thanks.  She is the author of One Thousand Gifts, which tells her story about  how writing down all the blessings every day has changed her life.  Sounds so simple, and it is......but the effect is profound..

A professor asked his students to write letters of gratitude...it changed their lives.  A dying woman wrote down all she is grateful for and still lives.  The stories Ann receives about how her book changed the lives of others would have you picking up your pen and paper to write down your own list of gifts that grace your life.  It has and I do, counting it all joy.

Proverbs 18:21 says their is the power of life and death in our words.  Our words speak life or death ~ our choice.  It is the same for the written word.  Do our words change the atmosphere in our home?  Do our words put a smile or a frown on the face of a child?  Do our words bring peace or anger into the hearts of others.  Count it all joy.

Joel and I watched the movie Captain Phillips late yesterday afternoon.  Based on a true story, it was 2+ hours of sheer tension.  Excellent movie but oh my goodness, it is not for the faint of heart.  When it was over we put on our tennies and went for a long walk, discussing the movie while releasing the tension we felt.  Then last night we watched the second episode of the new series "Resurrection".  The difference in the two was profound, but not for reasons you may think.  After watching the slower paced Resurrection I turned to Joel and said, "I don't like this show.  There is something about it that makes me very uncomfortable....an evil undertone that we could feel sitting in our comfy chairs.  It was like watching this show shifted the atmosphere in our home in a very negative way.  That is what Hollywood does, it shifts the atmosphere around us with fast car chases, or romantic comedy, or tension filled scenarios like Captain Phillips.  One show made both of us tense but exhilarated while observing the humanity of all involved and the survival skills and goodness of the captain.  The other made us both feel a sense of evil and foreboding. 

We made a decision not to watch this TV show again.  Grateful that we can just turn off that big unsightly rectangle that lures us into complicity.  We have a choice.

Just like making a choice not to watch all that comes across our screen, we make choices about what comes out of our mouths too!  IF we believe the Scriptures, then we believe there is the power of life and death IN OUR WORDS.  So what are we speaking?  What are we writing?  What are we watching?  What are we allowing others to speak into us?

Today I am counting the blessings of  our US Seals rescuing Captain Phillips, a remote that has an off button, the power and guidance in God's Word, and the pen and paper within my reach to count the gifts and give God glory.  In doing so, joy reaches out to embrace me, and in return I am able to bless others.  Full circle, this gratitude thing.  For that, too, I count it all joy.

God Speaks Healing

"By His stripes we are healed."

Isaiah 43:5

The past  few weeks I have been at a loss with how to write what I have been feeling lately~ the turmoil I have experienced in my spiritual life. The conflict within between rejoicing and lamenting.....it is very personal, and I wanted to make sure what I wrote came across well.

If you have read my blog for any length of time, you know how important my faith is. Joel has been an ordained pastor for the past 32 years and has been preaching and teaching much longer than that. He grew up liviing 1/4 mile from their country church and there never was a time that God was not active in their lives. My faith in God came at around age 11, and since then I have always relied on Him. We met at Bible college, and the faith we share is the foundation of our whole lives. After nearly 44 years of marriage, we are one, Joel and I. As Joel often says, our strong marriage is made up of three ropes braided together. Joel, me, and God.

SO, when Joel received a word from God on healing seven weeks ago, we rejoiced together. Joel actually woke up at around 4am and felt God speak in his heart..telling him he was healed. He also confirmed that healing to Joel in another way that supports his journey now. We are thrilled!!

Are his symptoms all gone??? Is Joel 100% well??? NO to both questions. But here is what we do know. Some of the healing that took place that night was IMMEDIATE. Like microwave healing. He could immediately double the amount of time he would walk without experiencing post exercise malaise. No crashing at all. He could immediately ride his bike 3 miles without post exercise malaise or other symptoms getting worse. His balance issues are GONE. Most of his pain has gone away immediately. GONE. His need for sleeping during the day has dropped in half. His memory issues are way down.

PRAISE GOD!

He has tested a few other things to see if they are gone and has discovered they are not. He still has a ways to go! He still is having die off symptoms when it is Bart reproduction time. "Their last stand" he calls it. He still needs to sleep once during the day, and he still can overdo and crash for a day. Gluten still causes symptoms and more fatigue. There are still a few of what my friend Linny calls "crock-pot healings" that need to take place before he will be back to his old self........He still continues to take his herbs and supplements and follow the doctor's treatment plan because we know the Lyme and CFS are continuing to heal. He is focusing on treating the rest of his symptoms while rejoicing in what is gone. GONE!

Things are so good right now that he is going back to work part time! He has been offered an Interim position with a newly formed parish where 4 churches are joining together to eventually share 2 full time pastors. Joel will be one of 3 part time pastors helping organize and set up and serve these congregations until they are ready to call full time pastors. Exciting. Challenging.

Amazing!

When I keep my eyes on Joel and what we have seen God do for him in the past 7 weeks I rejoice and cannot help but do a happy dance. I smile every time I gaze upon him. When I look in the mirror at myself and see someone who is still sick and spending most of her time in her recliner....I experience turmoil.

When Joel was awakened at 4 am in the morning, it was the same day as my mammogram that started me on the path to another breast biopsy and the need to rule out cancer. I think because Joel and I are so "one" in all areas of our lives, I expected I was healed too and my actions resulted with me going into a relapse for a few weeks. It was so discouraging when my reality was different than my sweet Joel's. I realize now that my journey to healing is going to be different than Joel's.   I am not "seeing signs" of healing as fast as I would like, but I am not Joel. Neither am I God.

"Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding.  In all your ways acknowledge Him and He will make your paths straight."

Proverbs 4: 5,6

We did not share with our family the whole story of Joel's healing until a couple of weeks ago. We expected cautious excitement and some skepticism...and loving concern for us that we may be disappointed. Pretty much just what happened too! There was and is joy and a cautious observing to see if this is real. If it will last. And a couple of family members asked..."What about Renee"? 

Someone said to me, "But what if......Joel crashes again....what if it is only your imagination....not God?" My response was, then we will look foolish. And that is okay to look foolish in our belief that God told Joel he was healed/ is healing. That is A-OK. Still, we are NOT thinking that way. We are just plain rejoicing in what has happened and what is ahead. We believe God healed Joel...He spoke to Joel's heart and he blessed him with a special gift to affirm that healing.  Isn't that amazing?!  

So the turmoil comes in the "what about me" questions that want to come in and steal my joy for Joel. I just am not going to let that happen...I am working hard on not relying on my feelings or thoughts but on what I KNOW.  And I know that God has a plan for us.

"For I know the plans I have for you says the Lord, plans for good and not for evil. 
To give you a future and a hope."

Jeremiah 29:11

I have noticed that I am very careful now about my words. What I speak over myself or others. What I read and what I take in. Some in depth Bible and book study on what has occurred has us going in new directions with our faith and beliefs on healing, health, and the power of our words. Through this time of learning, I have had some inner healing take place and am giving thanks to God for that!  And God blessed me with a special gift too just because He is such a loving God!

Don't we have an amazing Lord?  He loves us so much and wants us whole and healthy.  He desires us to know that the same power that raised Jesus from the dead is inside of each of us!  I love that!  He healed my husband of a devastating disease.  His body just needs to finish up with what his spirit already knows. He is healed! 

It gives us all hope, doesn't it!

The Power Of Words

I have been involved with a Bible Study for the past two weeks entitled The Power of Faith-filled Words.  It has been very helpful for me in so many ways.  Faith-filled words are on my mind to write about, but today I want to talk about the impact of the words we speak to others.  Our words hold a lot of power.  We "speak life and death with our words". ( Proverbs 18:21)

Thinking about the power of words brought up something that happened several years ago.  I had sent an email to someone close to me expressing my feelings concerning a situation that came from a place of deep emotion.  It was not mean, but it was not nice or any of my business.  The response I got was immediate and filled with anger.  A long email let me know that they had never felt they had my approval.  They had "tried for years" to get my approval and never had.  The email went on to say some pretty hurtful things judging my character and the person I was.  I was stunned. It made me sick to my stomach.  I realized the close relationship I felt I had with this person was based on misconception.  What I thought was real was not perceived the same way by them.  I felt horrible that he/she never ever felt they had my approval.  How awful!

I share this because it is important to realize the power behind our words.  The words that were said in that email had a huge impact on me.  I cried for weeks grieving what was lost, and for years I was afraid to say anything that would be taken wrong. Sometimes I still am. I also had to forgive this person for hurting me, and I had to work through what was said...was there any truth in the words that described me so negatively? Was I the Renee that my loved one spoke about? Since I held my loved one in high regard, it was a long process for me and very important.

The fact that this person did not feel they ever had my approval spoke volumes.  Were my words conveying what I really thought or felt?   Were my words and actions hurting others?  Yes, they were. Not only did my words hurt someone I care about, they had severe consequences for me.  I did apologize, and I have spent a lot of time praying for healing in this relationship. I also pray for God to remove any critical spirit within me as only He can do.  God will work all things out for good as He always does.

Yes, there is great power in our words.  And we cannot take them back.  They can be damaging and destruction or they can be helpful and encouraging....building others up.  Sometimes we do need to speak truth to others, but it needs to be done in love and as directed by God.  God gives us guidance in His Word for how we should speak to or about others.  We do have a choice.

Paul says in Ephesians 4:29  "Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen”.

Lest I leave you with only the negative impact of our words,  let us not forget the positive impact our words can have on others.   We can build up, encourage, and show love through our words.  All of us know what it feels like to be told "I love you".... "Great job"...."I forgive you".  We all have stories that bring to mind memories of how the words of others encouraged and shaped us.

There is power in our words!

"May the words of my mouth

 and the meditation of my heart

 be acceptable in Your sight 

Oh Lord,

 my rock and my Redeemer."

Psalm 19:14