Don't You See It?!

Forget the past............see, I am doing a new thing!  

Can you not see it?   

Today I read through Isaiah 43, after one verse popped up on Facebook.  I had been searching for a scripture, for something to wrap itself around my heart and calm the internal shaking as I waited for one more doctor appointment and one more test result.  Everything about this journey has been unpredictable, so I was holding my breath in anticipation of what was to come.  My, always hopeful, always steady, always strong hubby was showing some defeat as he walked with me through another cancer journey.  He was just as weary as I was, which had a sobering affect on me.  I hate when he is burdened with my stuff, but when you have been married 49 years that is what happens.  

So I grabbed on to Isaiah 43:19 that said,

"Look at the new thing I am going to do.  

It is already happening. 

 Don't you see it?  

I will make a road in the desert, 

I will make rivers in the dry land." ''

 Yes......we were ready for that.  A new thing......Just walking out life carefree and healthy.  In a devotional today I read..........."You will never be in complete control of your life.  It just isn't possible.  You want to feel completely safe and secure.  But even if you plan out every detail, the world will mess up your plans So just stop trying to be in control.  Stop trying to make your life completely safe and predictable.....and boring.  Instead grab My hand and jump in with both feet."   (Sarah Young, "Jesus Calling".)

It is what we want, isn't it.  Just to feel safe and secure as we live each day.  Yeah.  But our world is broken, and we need only watch the news or read a newspaper, tweet, or Facebook to see just how broken it is.  In the midst of us trying to control what is uncontrollable, Jesus says............Come on!  I am doing a new thing....See it???  Take my hand and lets jump into this together.

I am all for adventures in faithful living.  Oh, yeah.  Where do you want us to go Jesus.....we'll go!  What do you want us to do, Papa?  We will do it.  Come Holy, come!  It all sounds easy.........

Unfortunately, the enemy does not want us to surrender and jump in.  He wants us defeated and at times he throws so much crap our way that we lose our focus.  We just want to survive another day without melting into a puddle that has us surrendering not to God but to Satan's antics.  Joel and I have found it very difficult to move forward in hope lately.  And that is okay.  No condemnation and all that.  We have been taking breathers from the battles.......letting Papa and His angel armies fight for us.  I have read 6 lightweight mysteries in the past 10 days.  Joel has "putzed"  and napped more. Today's news made us stand a little straighter and injected us with more hope.  There is always hope.

The doctor's report was that the "big chunk" (doctor language) taken from my back had wide "clear" borders.  Yes!  Stitches were removed and the redness and bubbling on skin was just a reaction to the stitches.  Healing continues~ I go back every 3 months for 2 years and then every 6 months.  Good news.  We were so ready for good news from the world of white coats and stethoscopes.  We were putting our hope in the words from the doctor.  Necessary, but also not the final report.  The final reports come from God's Word.  And today His word came to us from Isaiah 43.

"Look at the new thing I am going to do.  

It is already happening. 

 Don't you see it?  

I will make a road in the desert, 

I will make rivers in the dry land." 

Staying In The River of God

Deeper water.....God beckons us into deeper water.  Ezekiel spoke of it when he described his vision from God in chapter 47 of his Old Testament book.  In the vision an angel measured the water in the river coming from the Temple of God...first ankle deep, then knee deep, waist deep....still manageable.  Still in his control.  And then Ezekiel said, "He measured off another thousand and by now it was a river I could not cross, because the water had risen and was deep enough to swim in~ a river that no one could cross."  Ezekiel 47:5

Way over his head.  The water.  The place where he had to depend on God to survive the deep.  It beckoned him....this place of surrender and trust.

I first reflected on Ezekiel's vision when we were planning a trip last fall to a conference on healing being held in CT.  With these and many other words from God on living waters and His provisions, I pondered what God was asking. As many of you know, a trip like this was a really big deal for me.  I had been homebound for 10 years, not traveling anywhere except to see the doctor treating me for Lyme Disease and other nasty bacteria.  Then God opened our eyes to His desire for us to be well, and my husband was healed overnight from Lyme and other health issues.  My healing has been  more of a process and I worried that I was not yet ready for such a big trip. 

Fear told me to stay home.  Just stay home.  Stay safe.....stay protected....stay within the borders.  The enemy also whispered lies, but God called me into deeper waters, asking me to trust Him.  I did.  He provided above and beyond what I could ask or think, and we had a life changing, powerful two weeks, making a vacation of it, traveling 3,000 miles, and attending a conference on healing.  Only God.

A few weeks ago, I began reading Heidi Baker's book, "Birthing The Miraculous" and came across the story in Ezekiel once again.  Deeper water.......where we cannot swim alone.  God calls us to a place of complete surrender.  While still reading the book, I also came across teachings on this vision that brought me to a "less of me and more of You" place  Deeper, deeper than I could ever imagined, my heart opened to Holy Spirit and I was immersed in His presence.  Undone by His love.

At times everything in me cried out......stay!  Stay on the bank of the river.  Wade don't dive.  It is safer here in the familiar.  You can manage your life as it is, and serve Him without full surrender.  Just stay, and avoid the risk.  My heart was willing and still is, but sometimes the flesh is weak.  Yet I am drawn to this "something more" He offers through intimacy, and I cannot resist His voice.  God is trustworthy, this I believe.  Holy Spirit knows what He is doing as He heals the inner crevices of my soul and offers more of God.  Trembling I whisper, "Spirit lead me to where my trust is without borders".

God calls us to a deeper relationship with Him and when we get past the fears and experience the deeper water we only want more.  Here we find life and healing as Ezekiel says in Ezekiel 47:6-9.  In the river, referred to in Ezekiel as the River of Healing,  we are immersed in His heart and He in ours.  We are cleansed, healed, blessed.  Blessed to be a blessing....

Stay. Come.  At times I still ponder the choices, but we are called to take a deep breath, dive in, let go, and embrace God.  "Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and lean not on your own understanding, in all your ways acknowledge Him ( surrender, obedience, immersion) and He will make your paths straight."  Proverbs 3:4,5

Staying safe in "Renee's world" is no longer really an option for me, because the truth is, the. truth. is. being immersed in the river of God, saying yes to Him IS the safest place to be.  This is where I need to be.  Where He beckons us all.......

I am linking up today with Bonnie over at Faith Barista.  Her prompt word for today is "stay".