Thursday, February 7, 2013

God Knows What He Is Doing

God knows what He is doing
Trust Him.
I confess, I have difficulty at times trusting what God is doing in my life and the lives of those I love.  I seriously have doubts that certain situations will "work out for our good".  I only see what is in front of me, and at times it is scary.  I know I do not want God to remove Himself from the picture, but I definitely want to join Him in directing traffic!  He needs my help I am certain, or things wouldn't be moving so slow.......or taking what appears to me to be wrong turns. There would not be places where disaster unfolds and pain takes up residence.
God knows what He is doing
Trust Him
 Years of illness eroded the thin layer of trust I brought into my relationship with God.  The death of a son at age 25 added to the erosion along with threats on my husband's life that lasted over 6 years. Life brings with it the good, the bad, and the ugly.  Too many circumstances to name challenged but at the same time strengthened our faith over the years. Over time I learned to trust God one step at a time in every area but one.  Safety. Fear took up a lot of space within my heart when it came to feeling safe in a world where bad things happened to good people.  Where bad things happened to me. The sudden onset of PTS and surfacing memories of sexual abuse and neglect over a year ago shook my world and for awhile increased the levels of anxiety and fear.  And yet..........

And yet............when I look back and remember........when I, like Joshua, build an altar of stones that each remind me of God's love and faithfulness over the years, then I am able to step out and trust God's promises. I am able to look back and see that God is healing me from the past that was hidden deep within, so I can let go of fear and live a faith-full life for Him now. I can believe that God is working all things out for good, no matter what I am seeing in the natural. 

God knows what He is doing
Trust Him

 God blessed me with two words to meditate on this year ~ trust and rest~ it is not a surprise to me because He has been speaking to me for years on trusting Him.  Since I am going to be 65 in a couple of months, it would be an understatement to say it has taken me awhile to step out in faith and believe I am safe when I rest with Him.  He is patient, and continues to guide and bless me along this challenging path.  As I pondered Bonnie's word prompt "trust" I realized that a lot of progress has been made.  "You've come a long way baby!"  Wow!  And I give thanks to God for never letting go of my hand along the way. To God be the glory.  I am so grateful.
There are still circumstances that bring to the surface anxiety and fear and for a moment or a day I wonder what in the world God is doing! The difference is, I know that those old friends no longer have control over my life.  That they are really lies that the enemy wants me to believe.  I need only remember to enter into God's resting place, turn to His Word,  and keep my eyes upon Jesus,  knowing I can rely on His promises, believing that God is with me wherever I go.  Including the hard places.
God knows what He is doing
Trust Him
I am linking up with Bonnie over at


Sharon said...

Beautiful, Renee. You have written words that echo my own heart. Learning how to trust God has been difficult for me. Because I get so scared, too.

But, I know that He is trustworthy - so I pray, "Lord, I believe. Help my unbelief!"


Cherry said...

Visiting from Faith Barista Jam - what great words you have chosen: trust, and rest. Our lives would be so different if we lived out those words every day. And by God's grace, we can all grow in trust, and in rest. Thanks for sharing. (And it's always fun to find another "gramma" online!)

HisFireFly said...

well said...
and how often I too want to help Him direct my life

may we continue to learn surrender, to be wholly His

Kim said...

Renee, I had no idea you'd been through such a heartbreaking loss and such a scary experience with a stalker on your husband. I am praying for you everyday. When I was very sick God told me He would "bring me back up again" and that is the prayer I'm praying for you. I think He meant more by that than I can understand, but I know it's full of good things.

Sharon, that is a prayer I say often too! I'm embarrassed sometimes by my lack of faith, but I know I can confess it to Him, because the father confessed it to Jesus, too. And He's so merciful to answer us and help us!

Katie said...

Thank you so much for your complete honesty and realness. I to suffer from PTSD, anxiety, depression...... due to past abuse. Trusting is so very hard for me sometimes, but God is faithful!

Anonymous said...

Thanks for commenting on my post. I'm glad to know that I'm not the only one who struggles in this area. I've been amazed and humbled by the transparency in all of the "Trust" posts I have been reading. May we all help each other on this journey.

tammy@meadows speak said...

{Visiting from Bonnie's place} I love how you talked about Joshua. How true! I am glad you are taking that step of faith. You may be 65, but we can be sisters of steppers in faith. :) Ps. Thanks for stopping by my place.

Beth in NC said...

Ah, I HATE fear and anxiety. They have stolen way too many years of my life. Stinkin' demons. Argh. I'm grateful God is greater! I know you are too!

We are all learning to trust Him more and He is a gracious Father isn't He?

Many blessings!

BARBIE said...

Thank you for commenting on my blog, so that I could come here to encourage you. It is hard to trust God, especially when things are going to hard. You've walked a hard journey too, my friend. Praying He continues to pull you closer as you learn to let go and trust.

Gayle said...

A beautifully written post Renee. I have been looking into the scriptures as well for peace and trust. It doesn't seem to take much to get me stirred up lately. The remedy is the word and prayer for me right now.
Hugs from a sister in Christ,