A History In Chimes

Our grandmother clock

As I sat in the living room on an early morning before sunrise, our grandmother clock declared the time as it counted off the hours with chimes that were as familiar as my own voice.  This smaller version of the grandfather clock has graced our home since 1975.  While living in the Philippines we took a picture of a clock down to a local builder and they created this beautiful piece of our history that still holds a special place in our home and in our hearts.

Last Wednesday we heard so much unsettling news as we spent time with the surgeon, then the radiology oncologist, and finally the medical oncologist.  We came home feeling beat up, confused, and overwhelmed by the words spoken.  I woke early the next morning, unable to sleep.  Going downstairs I opened the book of Psalms trying to find a word, any word to grasp on to.  Nothing seemed to speak clearly to my anxious mind.

And then the clock began to chime it's morning song.  A familiar comforting sound.  Over the years we have had to replace a part or two of the mechanisms, and there was a period of time when it sat silent in our home, unable to share it's sounds with us.  But several years ago Joel found a way to repair it and we have enjoyed it's melodic hourly reminder ever since.

Today it brought comfort to me as I try to come to terms with living in the balance of health vs disease.  As I try to prayerfully find an answer to the questions of what step to take next.......and where is God in the midst of it all.  And just what is the mystery He is unfolding as He continues to send me the same verse over and over..........mostly through the imperfect social media outlet, Facebook.  He has clearly stated He is fighting for me.......I am to remain calm.

Yes, there is a bit of an earthquake going on here with a few aftershocks.  Words like chemo, radiation, aggressive, advanced, dumbfounded, and unpredictable all swirl around in my head along with the ever present mantra spoken over me that I am an unusual case.  At times it is difficult to stand firm let alone remain calm.  Yet this morning God sent more love notes to me as I ran across a TED talk about a young woman who had been diagnosed with leukemia and after 4 years of chemo was cancer free.  She said the hardest part of all was learning to live in a body that had changed so much,  was not completely whole...........living a full life within her boundaries and not knowing what the future will bring.  I also listened to a sermon by Beni Johnson as she spoke about prayer.  I read the texts from my family lifting up prayers for us as this difficult season continues.  And don't we all go through those seasons?  All the above are more love notes from God.

The clock chimed a message to me in the quiet of the morning, and I realized I had the gift of another day.   I am still here to take in a sunrise, laugh with Joel, worship our Lord and give Him praise.  The chimes spoke to me Psalm 118:24, "This IS the day that the Lord has made, let us rejoice and be glad in it." 

Our grandfather clock has been with us through so many moves.......so much joy..........sorrow........difficulty.  It reminds us every time it chimes of our history filled with so many memories.  Most importantly it speaks of our history with God's goodness, His faithfulness, His presence in this process we call life. What a beautiful way to start the day!