"We are allowed to break". These words were written at InCourage on Friday by a woman who is grieving the sudden death of her father. So much loss, so much sadness overwhelming her. Her pastor had the good wisdom to tell her it is okay.
"This is going to take time, and it’s okay to crumble on the living room floor,
to weep and to cry out when the pain runs deep".
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It is okay to fall apart when a loved one dies. We are allowed to break. So often people believe that because we are Christians we need to rejoice when a loved one dies. After all, they are with Jesus. This is true, but it does not take away the loss those left here on earth experience. During times of loss, we are allowed to break.
We are allowed to break, and our God understands. He understands love and loss. He created us us to express our emotions, to express our sadness. We know our God is the God who comforts. Our God is the One who restores. Our God is the One who heals our brokenness, He does not ask us to deny our brokenness. He whispers..........."Come to Me........."
Joel and I have both stood at the graves of our dads in childhood, and of our moms not so many years ago. We have buried our son Kevin, and grieved the loss of friends and other loved ones. Joel has presided over countless funerals and stood by death beds watching people take their last breath. He has helped a family say good-bye to their dad and husband who had been burned over 95% of his body, helped another family prepare their dead baby for burial. He has sought to find words to comfort family members who question why their loved one was raped and murdered. At times life can be difficult and death can be brutal.
There are all kinds of losses that cause us grief. There certainly was a loss of life and security when 9-11 occurred. We grieve the senseless death and violence happening in our country right now. We grieve the loss of innocence that we are safe and sound on American soil. On some level Joel and I have experienced grief this past year with our plans to move falling apart, a diagnosis of breast cancer taking our breath away, radiation results beating up my body. We grieve what was lost and what appears to be lost. I would venture to say that nearly every person alive has experienced loss and grief. Besides the death of a loved one, maybe it is job or financial security that is taken away, the loss of a home or a beloved pet. Maybe it is a loss of trust in a marriage or in relationships.
Grieving is part of life, and there are times we will break, we will fall apart. It is okay. God will bend down and wrap His loving arms around us and shelter us. He will never leave us as we walk through the shadow of the valley of death. As we grieve the losses in our lives, having our roots buried deep in our faith will be what sustains us. We grieve with hope, knowing that we can stand on the truth of God's Word. We hold tight to His promises, one by one and we trust God to come to us in our brokenness and put us back together.
Grief and loss are a part of life. We are allowed to break, yet we need to remember Who we turn to. We remember Who comforts, shields, heals, who puts us back together with tender loving care. We listen to His Voice calling us.........."come to me..........".
"Come To Me" by Jenn Johnson
2 comments:
Powerful post Renee, I lost my mom when I was 21, not even mature in any stretch of the word. Lost my dad 25 yrs ago. I also lost my sister 11 yrs ago and several friends-you are right that we will suffer grief even when our loved ones are in Glory.
Thinking of you and Joel today; praying God's best for you both and health. Sending love your way.
Noreen
I love reading your blog...
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