Wednesday, June 11, 2014

Just Walking Through

I have been reading Bonnie Gray's book, Finding Spiritual Whitespace" and linking my posts up to Bonnie's Blog Tour  I plan to write a review for tomorrow, although I am sure readers know how I feel already!  Reading Bonnie's story has been a bit like opening Pandora's box for me.

Bonnie has been seeing one of the leading PTSD therapists in the country to help her along her journey with PTSD and childhood traumas surfacing.  He is a Christian man with great wisdom, and the bits and pieces of Dr. P.'s insights she has shared have been helpful for me, too.  In one section Bonnie wrote about the intense and sometimes subtle physical symptoms that occur when she is remembering or reliving a traumatic memory.   When reading her words I found myself nodding my head in agreement.  Confirmation came off those pages for me.

You see, when I was healed by Jesus from Lyme Disease, many things changed for me.  I have written about it here often.  But some symptoms hung around and would get worse when I was dealing with certain kinds of stress, or memories surfacing from childhood traumas.  When I began to have flashbacks with  PTS two years ago,  I decided to seek help through Sozo ministry which is a Holy Spirit guided inner healing ministry.   After several sessions I was doing very well, so I decided the PTS the doctors had diagnosed me with was wrong.....or at least now gone.   But even though the flashbacks were minimal to none, certain physical symptoms would increase or come back periodically.  Then Holy Spirit gently guided me to the a cause and affect connection.  Thankfully, over time as healing occurs, physical responses have lessened and I am now better equipped to acknowledge and walk through those times pretty quickly.  If not, I know in time this too shall pass.  Reading Bonnie's book, (thank you Jesus) has confirmed what I was experiencing and has given me new insights.  I was empowered by what she says about PTSD. 

"Maybe PTSD isn't who I really am.
Maybe it is just what I am walking through. 
 Maybe "beloved" is who I really am."
                                                                                                   Bonnie Gray

It is the truth that sets us free. And where do we find the truth?  In God's Word.  We are not a label, or a diagnosis.  We are just walking through those things.  What we are is God's beloved.  His b.e.l.o.v.e.d.  The truth, the TRUTH we find in HIS Word sets us free from the past.....from a diagnosis.....from being held captive to old memories and events that still try to define us.  I have received amazing physical and emotional healing in the past 18 months as Holy Spirit has unearthed that which was hidden and I have learned to trust the Healer more and more.  I, too, am just walking through!  Bonnie's book has been an amazing part of my journey and I am grateful for the truth she speaks.  The Truth sets us free.  The Truth says all His promises are yes and amen.  And the Truth says God delights in us.  He thinks we are amazing.  We are HIS beloved.

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